[KyleS28]

2 questions..

Do I call her to casually talk or call her to ask her to meet up?

At some point I will have to let her know my intentions and I'm not pursuing a friendship. How do I let her know my intentions without making it sound like I'm trying to win her back?

[Devorameira]

She'll know your intentions if you just don't contact her at all.

Why do you feel like you need to let her know anything? It's over, so move on and forget about it.

[talaniman]

The answer to both questions is to leave her alone! Why open old wounds?

[answerme_tender]

Kyle

Answers:

#1. NO.

#2. NO. You have stated that you haven't had contact 3.5 months. You want to make sure she understands that you don't want any friendship, oh and you don't want her to think you are trying to win her back.
Going through a break up is heart breaking and you just testing the waters to see if you can still hook her is just cruel. If you really want to do her a favor, just leave her alone to move on with her life.
If you ever cared for this woman, then do her one favor that she may never know about, but will benefit the most from, just go on with your life and leave her alone.

[KyleS28]

Maybe I wasn't clear as the last person definitely missunderstood what I was intending to say. She broke up with me. I haven't talked to her in 3.5 months. My emotions have moved on to where I am completely rational in my decisions and I want a second chance because I have never met anyone like her. I don't know how to go about seeing her again. I can't just ask for a second chance because I don't think she will be open to that initially.

[pandead]

Well, at least you are honest to yourself, she probably won't be "open to that." In fact, pretty much everywhere in the world, breaking up with someone means "I don't want you in my life" and she broke up with you.

You had 3,5 months to heal and move on. Seriously, it's not like it's been 2 weeks. 105 days later, you are at day 1... So no, I don't think you are "completely rational in your decisions."

How about not asking for a second chance and starting over with someone new instead of dealing with an old relationship?

[answerme_tender]

Kyle

Answers:

#1. NO

#2. NO ---she has moved on, and if she is that one who broke off the relationship, then had enough respect for you NOT to contact you and give you hope.
You have already basically answered your question in your last sentence in your 2nd post.
' I can't just ask for a second chance because I don't think she will be open to that initially.'
If she isn't going to open to getting back together why would you even put yourself through the heart break and disappointment?

[KyleS28]

Contacted her. She said glad I contacted her and that she was wondering how I've been. Thanks for the excellent advice everyone. Were going out Thursday.

[mystific]

Look forward to the post Friday.

[KyleS28]

Sent her a follow up text and received an ":)" text reply.

Who's running this site?

[Enigma1999]

sent her a follow up text and received an ":)" text reply.

whos running this site?

Kyle Kyle Kyle...

Well hey, I really wish you the best of luck.

If you think that this ":)" means, hey we are getting back together, well then in your situation I hope it's true.

Good luck and keep us posted.

[mystific]

she's easy to figure out. She is building her own confidence by using you and having you around. Don't listen to her, watch her actions. Easiest way to hook her is to turn the tables. Don't go out with your tail between your legs by going nc. Hook up with her, then let her know that there is another girl heavily pursuing you, then tell her that you've decided to leave her for this other girl because you don't settle for someone unsure of their level of commitment.

The key to understand is that you've already lost her. You can fight for her which will only push her away. You can go nc which will just end things. Or you can turn the tables on her and still have a shot with her chasing after you! Your choice.

So would one take this on how you're going to 'win' back your girl?

My... you're quite a catch.

(as posted here: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-450599-3.html)

[Enigma1999]

so would one take this on how you're going to 'win' back your girl?

my ... you're quite a catch.

(as posted here: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...-450599-3.html)

Ahhh wow mystific, you sure do your research. Lol

[mystific]

Lol.. just a very quiet day :)

[KyleS28]

What's with all the negative nancys? This isn't tellmehowemptymycupis.com.

[411Help]

You came here for advice. Based on our past experiences, we gave you what we honestly believe will make you a happier better person in THE LONG RUN. But, it is a free country and you're allowed to do whatever you please. I wish you the best of luck. Keep us posted.

[kaka67]

sent her a follow up text and received an ":)" text reply.

whos running this site?

Well obviously the :) has sealed the deal. She obviously can't stay away from you.

Must be your charming personality that did it.

[KyleS28]

So she just texted me to say 'forgot. I already have plans Thursday.' what does this mean? How do you forget prior engagements? She didn't suggest a new time to meet. What does this all mean?

[Enigma1999]

so she just texted me to say 'forgot. i already have plans thursday.' what does this mean? how do you forget prior engagements? she didnt suggest a new time to meet. what does this all mean?

Kyle,

This is her way of saying that it's over for her, and that she doesn't want to hang out with you.

I think that you need to move on.

Take this as a learning lesson and roll with it.

[KyleS28]

What if she really did have prior plans? I will try again for another night.