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Homegirl 50 · Jun 18, 2009, 02:22 PM

Originally Posted by sdiaz987

so i have been with my boyfriend for 10 years, long story short, I found out when we were broken up he had unprotected sex on several occasions. I am deeply hurt but I also feel that i am overreacting... I feel betrayed but i'm not sure if i should just accept it and move on.

I'm not understanding why you feel betrayed. You were not together and it was 5 years ago. Were you two having protected sex? If so, he was doing what he has always done, if not, he spent some time being careless. At any rate 5 years ago is too long ago to be tripping now. I think you need to ask yourself why this is bothering you now. Do you think he is cheating now? Is the relationship good now? Are you questioning why you are back together?
Just my opinion, but his unprotected sex 5 years ago is not the question, but rather why you are feeling this way.

N0help4u · Jun 18, 2009, 02:35 PM

Yep the past is the past and she needs to look at how her relationship has been since then!

cozyk · Jun 18, 2009, 03:10 PM

Originally Posted by sdiaz987

so i have been with my boyfriend for 10 years, long story short, I found out when we were broken up he had unprotected sex on several occasions. I am deeply hurt but I also feel that i am overreacting... I feel betrayed but i'm not sure if i should just accept it and move on.

Boyfriend... for TEN years! What's wrong with this picture?

Unprotected sex? He better get tested. Especially before he sleeps with you.

If you are broken up, and he is having sex with someone, then what right do you have to be hurt? It may hurt you, but that part you can't blame on him. The unprotected part, that's a problem.

Coming back to edit. Posted this after reading your initial post. I've since found out that was 5 years ago. And that you just now found this out, Forgive, forget and go on. Is there a wedding in the near future?

cozyk · Jun 18, 2009, 03:13 PM

You stated he cheated but the reality is he didn't because the two of you were on a break.

She did not say he cheated. She just said he had unprotected sex while they were broken up. And that it hurt her to find that out.

Homegirl 50 · Jun 18, 2009, 03:20 PM

Why did you break up and what happened that you are back together? Are you having second thoughts about being back together with him, is this why you're asking this question?

talaniman · Jun 18, 2009, 09:36 PM

Clearly we need some clarity of the facts about this 10 year relationship, as how old were they when they got together.

well we are still young and it happened when we were in high school.. we both have been tested since... this happened 5 years ago and I found out today a long story how..

The event is old, but the feelings are fresh. She admits its not about cheating, but unprotected sex, and they were tested, that has her concerned.

Gemini54 · Jun 19, 2009, 12:59 AM

I wonder if there is some insecurity in the relationship at the moment, and that's why this revelation about something that happened 5 years ago has hurt so much?