First off I am 22 she is 20, I met her off Match.com. We dated for a few months and everything was perfect, we loved each other and spent the spare time that we had to see each other. I never smothered her and she didn't to me, we both had our own lives still. It was what I considered healthy.

Half way into the relationship she revealed that her father abused her and her sisters when they were younger and that she is afraid of him , and also that she was told that she might have cancer. I told her and reassured her that no matter what happened I will still love you and she accepted that and knew I truly meant it.

As time gone by after that moment all seemed well, we laughed we played we loved we were happy so it seemed... 3 days ago I get a message saying we need to talk. My heart sunk I knew it was not good. She told me her father began stalking her at work and driving his car up and down there street. She told me she needed to be alone for awhile. I told her I would help her with anything and that I loved her and she replied "you can't help me I have to be alone and do things my way, I am really unhappy with my life and myself I'm sorry if you don't understand.

Immediately my head began racing thinking and trying to decipher what really is going on. I began asking just a few questions , I did not understand if this was a front or the actual thing. I was completely shocked by this all, I asked her if me and her were a perfect couple but everything else was ruining it for her and she replied yes. I'm still confused by the whole situation, I have dated many girls but she was different we both could feel that we were the ones for each other.

Now her father does not live with them anymore, he left his wife and two daughters last year, he was married for 18 years, then decided to cheat on her. He sexually assaulted them, and beat them when they were younger and now my ex's mother is trying to get legal action and he is trying to seek revenge. I guess what I cannot and may never figure out is if she's doing this for my own protection from him because she really did love me, or if she really needs this only for herself. Right now I'm playing the NC game I'm giving her the alone time that she wanted , and hoping for the best

She sent me a message yesterday saying "i still care for you and hopefully one day you will forgive me"

So give her the space she needs... I know you want to be there for her but you can't be if she won't let you... she may come around but in the meantime don't put your life on hold

Back off and give her some space. If her father truly sexually abused her and beat her, she has a lot of baggage to unpack, and she has to do it without you.

Encourage her to seek some counseling to help her heal from the past and just tell her you'll be there for her if she needs you. Then wait until she contacts you again.

I agree with this however don't put your life on hold or it could mean you're a long time holding on for something that might not amount to anything, Obviously the girl wants space so give her it, and take some for yourself and if she contacts you in the future and you're not involved with anyone then see what transpires, if anything, but don't wait around hoping, hopes got a mate named dope.!

Forgive her, and leave her alone. That's what she wants, sorry guy.

I did forgive her and have left her alone, if she contacts me then great if not then oh well it wasn't meant to be.