So my girlfriend and I have been dating since the beginning of high school. Were in our first year of college right now. For the past 4 months its been really rough. I found myself getting into arguments with her just because I was in a bad mood. In September I broke up with her for about a month because I was stressed and just wanted time to hang out with my friends. She was heart broken and leaned on a good guy friend of ours for support. After we got back together it was great for awhile until her and the good guy friend of ours started getting close fast. This drove me crazy and I started getting into arguments with her about hanging out with him and would even accused her of cheating on me if she was late somewhere. A few weeks after this friend had a birthday party who he invited both of us to but being the jealous guy I am I told her not to go and she didnt; we hung out instead. I could tell she awful throughout the whole night as they were practically best friends.. Fast forward to a month later and all three of us are at a party. Our guy friend ended up getting drunk and confessing he liked her and how awful of a person I was to her. She also got drunk and ended up telling me she's been depressed ever since I broke up with her in September and that Im not the guy she fell in love with. That's when it hit me hard. This girl had been there for me through thick and thin and all I did was take advantage of her. I was practically in tears when she told me this. I ended up texting the guy afterwards telling him to back off and to never talk to her again. When I told her this she got really upset but said she understood. I told her then that I would change and become a better person and treat her much better then I did before. She agreed and I honestly never felt more inspired. I ended up falling in love with her all over again. After a couple weeks I asked her how she was feeling about us honestly. That's when she told me that she wants a break from us. I didn't know what to say. She told me she noticed my change but that she thinks its too late as the feelings were already almost gone when she told me at the party. I couldn't help but break down right in front of her. The girl I had all my first experiences with was leaving. So here I am now on the first week of our break up and it has been harder then ever. We go to the same college and share the same group of friends so I see and hear of her quite a lot. I notice her and our guy friend getting close again and I don't think I could handle seeing her with someone else. I can't get over how awful of a person I was for treating someone I love so much so badly. I know deep down I could have saved it but I didn't.. I don't know what to do with myself and I need advice.

I no its not going to be easy for you but wouldn't you rather her be happy? Why don't you just ask her if she does eventually move on could she not maybe parade it in public as it would hurt you! Even though you have lost her as a partner just try be strong because it will be better than losing her as a friend as well