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    100Years2Live's Avatar
    100Years2Live Posts: 23, Reputation: 6
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    #1

    Mar 29, 2006, 07:51 AM
    Sexual Relations
    Me and Haley are Dating Now. Sorry I forgot to update people about my current realationship:rolleyes:

    So here's my questions. Spring break is coming up. My friends and I had a great idea about maybe spending it together. In a different state. So my parent's agreed not having a reason not to. So the 12 of us are leaving in April. 6 guys and 6 girls. My biggest concern is my friend Cody is big time into sexual relations, and has sugested an orgy several times. My cousin is going to be there since we are very close and she is all for it as long as we don't get to close, I feel the same way. However I don't like the Idea of letting someone else get to close to Haley. And I'm not so sure about the whole orgy thing either. Ive never had sex and neither has anyone else in the group but Cody seems really excited to try while we are by ourselves in a different state. I want to have fun in Florida but I don't want to have THAT much fun. If anyone has an idea about what to say let me know?
    Krs's Avatar
    Krs Posts: 2,906, Reputation: 320
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    #2

    Mar 29, 2006, 08:01 AM
    If you are all virgins, experiencing sex for the first time is definitley NOT wise to have orgy.. Please come on!!
    VLynn123's Avatar
    VLynn123 Posts: 35, Reputation: 5
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    #3

    Mar 29, 2006, 10:28 AM
    I really suggest you really rethink this. Don't let anyone pressure you to do something you are uneasy with. You have to think, Is this really the way you want to lose your virginity? If you have second thoughts about it, then you are definitely not ready for this. Please think about this before acting on it. Losing your virginity only comes once in your life.
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #4

    Mar 29, 2006, 10:34 AM
    Uh no.

    Not the best way to get your new relationship off to a start.

    Have the guts to say no if no one else will. They might make some noise, but I'm guessing more will silently agree than not. And unless Haley is into that, she'll likely respect you for standing up and not giving in.
    phillysteakandcheese's Avatar
    phillysteakandcheese Posts: 973, Reputation: 356
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    #5

    Mar 29, 2006, 02:30 PM
    I can just imagine what you'll be thinking...

    As soon as the clothes start coming off, you'll be excited, but you'll also be curious about "size" and "technique" and in "competition" with the others. Then, you'll start to compare "performance" and "satisfaction".

    I don't think this would make for a very good first memory.

    I'd follow kp's advice above.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,304, Reputation: 7692
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    #6

    Mar 29, 2006, 03:28 PM
    First let me say that do you really want to be with a boy friend that wants to have sex with your other friends, not much of a idea relationship. I would really start to wonder if he is really the type of boy I would even want to go out with.

    And he most certainly has no respect for you, believing it is OK for just anyone who happens to want to , to have sex with you during that time.

    I believe I would run from that relastionship about as fast as I could.

    A boyfriend that really cares for you would not want anyone else to "be with" you, and would not want to be with someone else either.
    DrJ's Avatar
    DrJ Posts: 1,328, Reputation: 339
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    #7

    Mar 29, 2006, 03:32 PM
    Umm... Father Chuck, you may want to read HIS post a little closer lol
    orange's Avatar
    orange Posts: 1,364, Reputation: 197
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    #8

    Mar 29, 2006, 04:35 PM
    I agree with what everyone has said. You are a virgin and therefore are inexperienced sexually. Your first sexual experience should be with one person, not several! I would think it would be extremely uncomfortable and someone will end up getting hurt. You'll likely regret it afterwards. Not to mention, there are health considerations. Even if everyone at the orgy practices safer sex, the chances of getting a disease or having an accidental pregnancy will be greatly increased with the multiple partners.
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
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    #9

    Mar 29, 2006, 07:13 PM
    Tell your friend Cody to wake up and smell the coffee ; STDs, some fatal, particularly AIDS; pregnancy followed by 18 or more years of forced child support payments. Tell him that you don't want any of this stuff happening to you. If Cody wants to have illicit sexual relations at his age he's a fool. Frankly I'd leave Cody at home ; he sounds like a bad influence.
    giggles's Avatar
    giggles Posts: 143, Reputation: 27
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    #10

    Mar 29, 2006, 08:25 PM
    It sounds to me like your buddy cody just wants to act out fantasies rather than have a good time with friends!
    Look, in theory this sounds great - but I agree with the above posts - in reality this would turn into a messy situation. Never mind the std/pregnancy worries - on an emotional level, it would turn into an almighty headf***, and all of your friendships would suffer as a result. Even if all of you were sexually experienced, it's no guarantee that everything would go smoothly.
    A good friend of mine was into group sex in his early twenties with a couple of neighbours. Now, he says, despite the experience it gave him, it was more damaging than beneficial - he is no longer friends with any of those people (they got too intimate and couldn't handle the fallout of that!), and he says he feels quite uncomfortable at some of the memories. Think about it: your hormones and the group dynamic might lead you into doing things you might have reservations about normally.
    I would say, don't do it. Your girlfriend will appreciate your saying no too, and commend your strength of character, believe me. Good luck, and have a good trip x
    CaptainForest's Avatar
    CaptainForest Posts: 3,645, Reputation: 393
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    #11

    Mar 29, 2006, 10:01 PM
    I agree with the rest.

    Don't do it... not your first time at least.


    Also it is a bit hypocritical…you wish to do it but expect Haley not to.

    Say no, odds are most probably would agree. And if they want to do it, then don't go to FL with Cody.
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,928, Reputation: 674
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    #12

    Mar 30, 2006, 05:50 AM
    Hi,
    This Cody and your cousin want to?
    All you have to say is "no", and keep Haley out of it, too.
    Let Cody do whatever he wants; but you don't have to be a part of it.
    If you are really concerned about it, then talk with Cody before you go on the trip, and tell him "no".
    If that doesn't help any, then don't go. Find a new friend.
    100Years2Live's Avatar
    100Years2Live Posts: 23, Reputation: 6
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    #13

    Mar 30, 2006, 06:40 AM
    Ok hahaha, I talked to Cody about this and he was just kidding and they where all playing a trick on me. Mean, but that's just my friends. After a good laugh they told me to calm down they would never do that. Sorry about that!
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,928, Reputation: 674
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    #14

    Mar 30, 2006, 06:49 AM
    Hi,
    No need to be sorry. One never knows sometimes if something is meant as a joke or not.
    I am glad they are joking, and hope you have a wonderful trip.
    I use to live in Ft. Lauderdale, many years ago, for about 4 yrs. If that's where you are going, have a great time.
    rewes's Avatar
    rewes Posts: 40, Reputation: 4
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    #15

    Oct 19, 2009, 05:15 PM

    100, Just say NO. It's not the way you wanted your first time to be.
    If you say it when your other friends are around, they will probably back you up.
    Don't let peer pressure ruin such a personal event in your life. There are no do-overs.
    The idea of an orgy parobably won't happen unless you all are drunk or high on something.
    This scenerio sounds like a recipe for pregnancy. Believe me... Just say NO! And don't feel bad about it. These people won't be in your life as long as the memory will last, so make the memory a good one. Rewes

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