Im 21 she is 22. I dropped off a friend at her friends house (Nic.). Nic. Was outside and waved, I waved back from in the car. I have never meet her. She asked my friend who I was. Couple days later she added me on Myspace. Sent me a email and asked how I was doing, I said good. I mainly use Facebook so I added her on Facebook. Later that night I get a text. I asked who it was and she said Nic. I got your number from Facebook. So we texted back and forth that night. This went on for a few days, kind of got to know each other and what not. She asked If I wanted to meet for Coffee or something and I said yes. So we meet @ Starbucks and saw a movie. I went on a few dates in the last 2 months. But when I was with her the attraction was sooo strong. We "clicked" so well. I can tell she was very interested. Anyway after the movie she drove me back to my car @ starbucks and said to text her later. Later that night she went on to say I looked like a model, liked my smile and whatnot. I already told her she looked pretty but told her again. I said I couldn't help but smile when I was with her, which is very true. The following day she asked if she could come over. I said yes and we watched a movie. I grabbed her hand toward the end and made a comment. Then I gently set it down and said "your going to get me in trouble" and leaned forward to get up. She grabbed my shirt and slowly pulled me back. I turned around and kissed her. One thing led to another.

The next day we texted back and forth. The following day we went out to a dance hall had a few drinks talked a lot and danced for 2 songs. Then she came back to my place for a while before returning back to her parents. The next day we texted (during the week so I was working) and she made plans to bring her son over at the last minute so we could hang out. But he was being very bad so she said never mind, which was fine. The day after that, I texted her and she never responded. The day after that (today) I texted her twice to see if she was OK, since its unlike her to not text. Many many hours later she replied

"Not sure about anything right now moms in the hospital..."

Later I replied basically saying that whatever is going on she can tell me.

She said I didn't need to know about her problems its OK she can handle it herself, she always does and she is used to it."

I said "fair enough you don't need to tell me but I will and can help you if you need it. Just let me know what you decide so I know. I also asked her if she wanted to go to MardiGras that weekend, since we had talked about it. I said to let me know by tomorrow so I can make reservations.


After our first two dates, she told me how much she likes my personality and stuff like that ("I really like you"). I told her I liked her too. What I don't understand is why all of sudden is she so distant. Absolutely, nothing happened between us to cause this so I'm very confused. I have to say I do miss the way she made me feel, the attraction and happiness was intense on both ends. I'm kind of sad that this is happening. Perhaps its nothing or maybe something happened. I know time will tell but maybe some advice on the right approach will help.

For example, do I not text her and let her text me. I've been doing very good @ not harassing her. But like tomorrow, if she doesn't text me should I text her or just let it go?

I kind of want to ask her where we stand. Should I do that? If I do, I want to wait at least until tomorrow or the following day. What do you think? What happened?

Dude, her mom is in the hospital. TAKE A CHILL PILL.

She doesn't want to think about anything else other than her mom.

Keep bothering her, she will never talk to you again.

You need to give her the space she needs and deserves. I don't know if you ever had to deal with a loved on in the hospital, but depending on the circumstances, it can be very tough to deal with.

Plus, you only went out together a few times. You are not in a relationship. You are dating. Keep this up, and you won't get anything.

"Not sure about anything right now moms in the hospital..."

Right but I honestly don't completely believe that. The reason being is because you don't simply stop texting someone for two days even if something really bad is going on. Also, she had me text her ex from her phone to tell him we were on a date because he kept harassing her. She left him 6 months ago because he cheated on her numerous times. She finally called it quites. I honestly believe there is an ex-factor involved but I didn't post that because it's only speculation.

So you are not even in a real relationship with this girl yet and you already don't trust her?

Sounds like you need to take a step back, you don't sound ready for a relationship.

You totally "stop texting someone for two days even if something really bad is going on", especially someone who you barely even know and are not in a full relationship with.

She told you she is busy with something very stressful, you need to take it for that. If it turns out she was lying, so be it.

So you are not even in a real relationship with this girl yet and you already don't trust her?

Umm, that's not what I'm saying dude... girls will make up stuff to let a guy down.. I'm not saying that is what she is doing but its possible. When you first meet someone it takes time to build trust. Have you been in a relationship?? I need advice from someone that has experience. I was in a 2 year relationship and have a SMALL grasps on how woman act

I think you are over-thinking a very simple situation and turning it way to complex.

This will scare her away.

Sure it takes a while to build trust, but you should not go into a relationship with someone that you don't seem to trust in the slightest degree. If you are already questioning what this girl is telling you, that is not a normal or healthy way to interact with anyone.

I think you are over-thinking a very simple situation and turning it way to complex.

This will scare her away.

Sure it takes a while to build trust, but you should not go into a relationship with someone that you don't seem to trust in the slightest degree. If you are already questioning what this girl is telling you, that is not a normal or healthy way to interact with anyone.

If people posting legitimate questions is "overthinking" it then what good is this site?

I wish you would have read my post. I've only txted her 2 times over a two day period... how the He^$ would I scare her off. Instead of asking her all these questions, I'm asking them here. Come on now

Sure it takes a while to build trust, but you should not go into a relationship with someone that you don't seem to trust in the slightest degree. If you are already questioning what this girl is telling you, that is not a normal or healthy way to interact with anyone.

OK, like I said I can't type every little detail here it would take too long. Instead of criticizing me answer the questions, if you can't then move on. Thank you!

Here is a more direct approach for you, does this make sense?

Just let it go.

Her mom is in the hospital, she is occupied with that. That is what happened.

Maybe you could be like... patient, in case she does have some very personal issues to tend to.

Try again next week, and see what happens. That's what I would do.

Maybe you could be like.........patient, in case she does have some very personal issues to tend to.

Try again next week, and see what happens. Thats what I would do.

Thank you :) I know I'm probably jumping the gun. To be honest, I have a couple of girls that are trying to get me to go out with them. I've been putting them off because I do like her, but I guess I will proceed with the dates and try back later. Does that mean I should not text her @ all unless she does so first?

Yup.