My girlfirend says that she wants her because,she feels that I have insecurity issues,I found a draft that was saying that last night was magic and there after there was an sms from a colleague asking if she can go with him to a funeral and there after she says that her phone was used by her friend which is why she did not feel the need to delete and then I just lost and pushed her and I've never done that before and I was surprised myself that I ended up doing that,years ago when we were in tertiary she was pregnant and we were both young and did not know what to do and for me I had a year to go and my dad is very strict and told me that if I were to have a kid,he would disown and she that but at the end of the day I told her that it was her choice and then she had an abortion, I stay in pretoria and she stays in joburg and for to get there it took money which I did have!I had to look for money that day so I could go the next day and all of that is coming back as well and it happened in 2005,she once cheated on me and I found out and I went and did the same thing and there after I felt gulity and wanted to spite her and told her that I cheated as well and she was angry but it took years to accept that she did that to me and treated unfairly sometimes and remidning her of what she did and called her by names and now recenlty I found her with a colleague and with someone else in the car and the two of them were sitting in the back of the car and the other guy in front but the is actually married and has kid,but when I called her to tell her that I was coming she was avoiding my calls because we had a fight during the day at work(we work in the same place),she told me that I'm thinking wrong things and its pushing her away and that's whe nshe told me that she wants her space,sometimes she does not want kiss and I ended up doing something that I don't think she knows it yet, I ejaculated inside her and she does not know it because I know she wants to start family but she says not now and that we are ready to have a kid but before she used to be so anxious about me marrying her,now she always just gives me a cold shoulder and tells me that she wants her space,when I ask her if I can come through to spend time with her she tells me that she needs her space and she wants to be alone and tells me that there is nothing wrong that she is doing... and that I sohlud trust and says that she does not know what she wants and she is in the middle of wanting to be with and letting me go,please help

Your relationship was over years ago.

You have been hanging onto dead things

I really think its about time you end all this stupid pain.
And work on yourself

Go no contact with her read the stickes find a hobby
Do anything to get your mind off her.

By the way. Why would you push a women? I don't care what you was feeling.
Bad move!

Just move on stop waiting around for people to make up there mind for you!
Make your own mind up and do your own thing here.

You know what you must do to make yourself happy.

Because you are not happy now.

But the things we both love each other so much and we both want to get married

I love this woman so much and I know that she loves me to,but she told me that she is not doing anything... when she starts not to answer her phone I start thinking a lot things and I get all these funny thoughts and it just maes me nuts,I picture her doing a lot of things..

Look I feel for you man

But how can you love each other? When you have CHEATED ON EACH OTHER.

And yous ay she loves you?

She wants space.. and has sleept with other men.

This does not sound like love

This sounds like someone is to scared to be alone. And will do anything to keep a bit of affection.

I'm sorry. But you need to change your way of thinking..


The reason why you think of her doing so many things is because
You don't trust her

Why.. because she cheated on you..
And that just adds more fuel to the crazy what if fire!

Do yourself a favor. I know its hard
But leave her alone.

If you are going to come back with she loves me crap. And try and defend her.

Then you are not ready for help.

I know for a fact that no one on here will tell you. That it is a good idea for you to be with this women
Not just because she cheated and does not want to

But you.. are not ready for a relationship and this one is not healthy for either of you.

Im not defending her,how do I get over her then?because things were fine for the past two years and I think she might even be pregnant so how do I deal with that type of situation..

Found out if they babey is yours first.

If it is. Then take care of it.

Cut off ties with the mother though.

As for getting over someone its hard!
But it is done all the time.

Trust me

Do yourself a favor, and give her what she wants, and leave her alone. Your just keep pushing her away, as it is.