My ex girlfriend who I am really still close with is in her last year at college which is 5 hours away. We managed to get through the first year and half together but stress got to her and we broke it off after that. But we are so close and still had strong feelings that it was kind of unspkoen but we wouldn't see other people. The noly time I see her is a bit in summer and around holidays for a week. Every summer we always grew very close again and the spark was lit up again. And I know if we have enough time together it will happen again. But this is her last year at college and her most busiest ans stressful one yet. She don't have too much time to devote to us and I understand that. My problem is that I know when we are together we make a great couple and our love comes back fairly quick but we wants to try and move away for a job in the summer and not give us a chance. I know if we had some time she may feel differently about us. But she just don't seem to think it will ever work out and we should just remain friends now. I know that I can make it work and my feelings are strong enough but I can't seem to make her realize the same thing. We got through almost 4 years of this and we last this long, but now the idea of a job is pushing me away. Its not like it's a definite of her getting a job in this economy very quickly. Plus me not being able to physically be with her only pushes her away to make other realtionships and now she grew very close to a guy friend and they have some mutual feelings. But she won't act on them because of me. So I know she still cares but not enough to understand that we have a chance. Am I being completely naïve and dumb or do we have a chance? Should I let her go even though I know it would be a mistake?

It sounds like you may be in two different stages of life. Her main priority is finishing school and starting her career. She may not want to settle down. She may want to keep her options open, develop her career, and find a mate after that. This is pretty common for her age group. I know most of my friends and I went through the same thing.

I read some of your old posts. Two years ago you were trying to figure out what to do for a career. Have you figured out what you want now? Are you working in that field?

If she is telling you that's what she wants, you should respect what she is saying. She has to live her life the way she sees fit.

I just went back to school this semester to finish my degree and I know I want to be in the law enforcement field. And I do respect what she is saying and I'm not pushing her into anything I just know that if we have time we can once again get our spark back. And she knows this but is trying to push me away genlty so if and when she has to move it won't be as hard. But I don't want to give her up until I definitely have to. She may not have to move away right out of college.

I'm glad to hear that. Even two years ago, that's what you wanted to do. Finding what you want in life and working towards that goal is the best thing you can be doing. I was a bit concerned about her completing college and your not knowing what you wanted. I saw where you posted this in response to another question:

I know its hard to think about letting her go but you might have to. It seems as if she dont fully feel that same you that you do.

I think right now you are in the same position - not as far an another guy is concerned, but as far as the two of you not wanting the same things. I think your best bet is to finish college and get started in law enforcement. You might even be surprised how your priorities and needs change.

Yea we both know the logical thing to do and it seems as if she's acting on it and trying to break it off. And I have my doubts about us working out but she was worth trying for the last 3 and half years I don't feel like giving up now is worth it for me. There's no doubt that I'm finishing college finally but at this point my concern is wanting to still be with her. I understand that I will have to let go if and when she moves but that's not an option yet. My brain and heart tell me two defferent things and so far and as well as the last 3 and half years my heart has been wnning the battle.