I fell for this girl really hard...

And I'm not going to lie she put me through some dramatic in the past...

We broke up 2 weeks before school ended, and we remained friends... we even acted like we were together... holding hands, sex, kissing, etc.

She got drunk the night before school ended and left without saying goodbye (she didn't think I wanted to say goodbye because she was being a big that night)

But when school ended we went our separate ways and we only talked once in a while

I sent her a birthday gift, she called me and thanked me and we talked for like 2 hours until she had to go to work... we flirted and everything

I called her on Saturday because I went though a rough moment in my life (really really rough). I called her like 20 times when she didn't pick up... I also sent her a text saying "I just don't want you to hate me"

And now she won't answer my calls...

My brother was worried last week and talked to her and showed me this message today...

"Hey Marshall, I apologize for taking a while to write back I have just been crazy busy with work. First- don't worry I won't say anything to Winthrop about you sending me anything and even if he did get pissed.. he is not that scary haha. Thank you for taking the time to write to me though, I appreciate it and your concern for your brother. About the video game thing- my brother is a gamer too.. I recommend you all get a life. lol.. Justtt kidding. I'm sure WOW can be addicting ... I have an addictive personality so that is my excuse for never getting involved ;-)

I'll attempt to explain some of what has been going through my head to you.. I do know that I may hold the power that you describe regarding Winthrop's happiness because he has had that same power over me. My whole issue has nothing to do with not having feelings for him or a sudden change in feelings... it's just that when we started dating or seeing each other everything moved so quickly and seemed to happen all at once... what I began to realize is before I can depend on someone else making me happy .. I need to be able to be happy alone and also because I know how serious our relationship was/could be... I do not want to move forward with something unless I know that I am personally and emotionally ready to do so.

So yeah, we need time apart... it sucks... but I also try to distance myself a little bit from talking to him all of the time because I do not want him to depend on me either..I want him to be sure of himself and strong for himself alone... I don't know if that makes sense?...I also do not feel it is fair to talk to him only on my terms either so.. ultimately it just has lead to us talking on the phone a few times a week instead of a few times a day.

I know how he is or can be about expressing his feelings... or Lack of doing so. I do believe he has gotten better.. at least toward me so I figure that is a plus. But yeah, him and I did open up to each other A LOT and fast... which due to some things in my past (trust issues) that has been hard for me to accept , but I have and I know that regardless of what happens ... because he knows me so well and I know him so well.. we should never have a problem being friends.. at the least anyways.

I don't know what the future will bring nor do I want to waste time attempting to predict it but I hope I get to meet you as well! I will talk to you later... good luck with the end of high school... I couldn't wait to get out haha... don't yell at your computer too much- it's not its' fault you suck at games. ;-)"

Do you think that we have a chance to get back together?

Also should I just give her sometime to her self and not call her at all? I'm afraid she's going to forget about me If I don't call her...

If I shouldn't call her how long should it be?

Should I move on?

I have no idea what to do... women confuse the out of me...

Who is Winthrop? Is that her current boyfriend?

Sorry a little lost here. I've read the question over and over.

From what I read. I think you should definitely move on.

Sarah

She made a decision to follow her own path, and you must do the same.

Move on, and get a life that you enjoy without her, and make her understand your healing comes before a friendship for now, and you need to stop the contact, to end the confusion, and false hope.

Sorry guy, I see no other way for this to work. You have questions I know.

Trust me, female are just as confused as you are.

I agree with some good ole' "no contact" She's trying to be your friend to let you down easy, and what she sent to your brother she fully expected to conveniently fall into your hands. Avoid her like the plague or you'll never be able to heal and get your confidence back. It seems like you're a nice dude, you sent her a gift even after you two broke up, you'll be fine when your ready to get out and start dating again. You should delete her number and toss out her contact information, that way if your feeling vulnerable you won't be able to contact her and feel worse if she doesn't pick up or get back to you.

I'm Winthrop

I re-read it without a two year old on lap.

Now that I fully understand the situation I think that you should stay away from her. I'd go with Tal's advice and move on.

Sarah