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    cheese_man's Avatar
    cheese_man Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 26, 2013, 05:21 AM
    Mixed signals from a girl, should I walk away?
    Me and this girl were on and off dating for about 10 months last year. We were extremely close. We would see each other at least 3 times a week, even in the periods when we weren't hooking up or dating. We were pretty much best friends. In December she went back to her ex of 4 years and we didn't speak for 4 months. I saw her 4 months later and she said they broke up and we started seeing each other again for the past 3 months. Now this last month she told me we're just friends again, and I said fine and started going no contact. After that day I seen her once a week and every time we have kissed and been super close, yet after the time spent she goes distant and I don't hear from her for like a week.

    So last Friday we hung out and everything was great. On the Monday I tried to call her, she ignored my call, didn't call back. Tuesday I tried to call her again twice, no answer no call back. Then it happened. My grandfather passed away on Wednesday morning and I am living in another country so I was very sad and lonely. I texted her asking if she's OK cause she didn't return my calls and I told her the sad news and I said I could really use someone to talk to. Well she replied immediately saying she's sorry for my loss etc and said she will call me later. Didn't hear from her all day, so I called her in the evening. No reply but she called back straight away and was very offish on the phone, like she had to speak to me. Then after about 2 minutes on the phone, she said she has another call, she'll call me back. No call back. Texted her an hour later saying if you're not busy after work do you want to come hang out, I could use a laugh and just relax with you. No reply.

    Everyone I know has gone out their way to message me and call me to see how I am doing, yet the girl I care for the most acted like she couldn't give 2 s**** and I haven't even heard a word from her. We supposed to be close friends even if we are not dating. So I'm really hurt and disappointed that she would act this way. All I needed was to talk to her and for her to show a bit of compassion. Is this the right time for me to just walk away, or do I call her out on this?
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,825, Reputation: 2035
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    #2

    Sep 26, 2013, 06:30 AM
    She isn't interested in getting back to you even as friendship. Let it go. Maybe she just got a boyfriend that doesn't want her talking to other guys. Who knows. If she wanted to talk she would have by now
    Mozzie's Avatar
    Mozzie Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Sep 26, 2013, 06:52 AM
    She's playing with your feelings and treating you as a stepping stone. It seems like she's only interested when she's bored/lonely/single. Don't let her do that I bet she's loving the attention you're giving her, maybe that's why she's ignoring you to make you 'chase her' when it isn't worth chasing a girl who messes you around for her ex then expects you to open your arms to her when he probably doesn't want her anymore. You may have been good friends but she sounds a bit of a cow to be honest. Don't contact her again and wait for her to contact you, see how long it is until she does after your messages stop and that's when you'll know if she really cares or not. Hope this helps :)
    cheese_man's Avatar
    cheese_man Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Sep 29, 2013, 07:37 AM
    You thanks for your response, I still haven't heard a word from her since that night. Not even a message. I think she may be getting back together with her ex because last time they got back together it was the same. We were seeing each other, then over night she stopped answering my calls and we just didn't speak for 4 months with no explanation, then I saw her again and she acted like nothing happened. Only reason I can think she's pushing me away is because of him or maybe someone new. But my gut is telling me it's the ex. They were together 4 years and were always breaking up getting back together. From the things I heard about them they had a pretty fukd up relationship. So it wouldn't surprise me if its him again. Anyway after being so rude to me this week and obviously trying to push me away I don't want to talk to her again. I always treated her amazingly and she knows it. But if she could be such a cow to me overnight then I have nothing more to say. Even if she tries to call me at some point I won't speak to her. We shared a lot of memories and loads of time together the past year and a half but if she can treat me so badly suddenly, I don't deserve that
    Handyman2007's Avatar
    Handyman2007 Posts: 988, Reputation: 73
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    #5

    Sep 29, 2013, 08:00 AM
    Here is what every young person needs to do when faced with a relationship crisis---WALK AWAY. Just end it and move on. This "no contact" thing is the dumbest thing I have ever certainly heard of. If two people break up, then a "no contact" pact it completely unnecessary. If you are broken up it's apparent one or the other wants no contact any way.. Grow up kids. If it just isn't working out, move on.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,107, Reputation: 10852
    Expert
     
    #6

    Sep 29, 2013, 05:57 PM
    Same girl?

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating...do-734149.html

    Just disappear from her life dude with no more conversation. And NC is not a pact, its an attitude that keep you from being confused and mislead and make better decisions without the false hope of working things out.

    Ignore her attempts to call you when she is bored, or curious

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/3397086-post6.html
    cheese_man's Avatar
    cheese_man Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #7

    Oct 1, 2013, 09:41 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Same girl?

    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating...do-734149.html

    Just disappear from her life dude with no more conversation. And NC is not a pact, its an attitude that keep you from being confused and mislead and make better decisions without the false hope of working things out.

    Ignore her attempts to call you when she is bored, or curious

    Ask Me Help Desk - View Single Post - She says she hates me and I don't know what to do!?

    yup same girl dude... same thing has happened as my previous post where she literally started ignoring me over night... and its quite unbelievable its happened again. After my previous post about her hating me, we didn't speak for 4 months. Then I saw her out randomly one night and we spoke and after that she was constantly trying to see me. For 3 weeks she was calling me trying to see me, before I eventually did. Well after that we dated for about 2 months, then she started becoming slowly more distant, however we were still on and off for about another 2 months. So at that point I decided to back off and we were only seeing each other once a week and hardly speaking in between. Then I saw her the Friday before she started ignoring me and everything was great. One of the best nights we had together in a while. And then suddenly from that day she ignored all my calls, all my texts and then I asked to come over when my grandpa died and she didn't even reply... that was last Wednesday. Still not a single word from her. I'm pretty sure she has gotten back together with her ex yet again, it's the only explanatation for ignoring me like this again, and it happened before when she just started ignoring me and didn't even speak to me about it..
    she hasn't even sent me a message to ask how I'm doing or anything like that... F that man, I'm over it... really never want to speak to her again. Who knows if she will try to contact me, but if she does I will not speak to her.. I have been feeling much better this last week not having to think about her and what she wants from me and all the mixed signals crap, but I do still miss her unfortunately.. its crazy that 2 days after spending a great night together she just starts ignoring me... this time I won't make the same mistake as I did in my previous thread, I have nothing left to say...
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,787, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #8

    Oct 1, 2013, 10:08 PM
    Time to walk away permanently

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