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    onlymyself's Avatar
    onlymyself Posts: 50, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member

    Jul 2, 2019, 11:43 AM
    Lack of affection and lack of time together in a relationship
    I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 6 years and for the past 2 years he only wants to meet on Saturday and Sundays. We are in our mid twenties and if I suggest that I go over to his house or he comes over to mine (we still both live with our parents and distance is about 8 kilometres and we both drive) during the week he says that he doesn't feel like it after 8 hours of work, even on Friday nights.

    When I ask him if he wants to end the relationship, whether there is another girl and why he barely wants to do anything he says that he is just bored in general (not in the relationship) and that he doesn’t want to break up and that he is not cheating. Also each time I try to address this issue of lack of attention he says that I am always picking up a fight about something and that meeting twice a week is fine. I told him that I feel that he is lacking affection and he told me that I should accept him as he is not try to change him.

    I love him but I feel that this relationship is not going anywhere and I feel that I am missing out on enjoying life, going out and meeting people. Is expecting him to give me more than 8 hours a week (around 4 hrs on Saturday and 4 hours on Sundays) and him being so laid back fishy after 6 years? I am finding it really hard to leave this relationship as one day I make up my mind that I will end the relationship and the next day I freak out about the idea of breaking up after the effort I put in after 6 years and feel really lost about what to do if I break up.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,137, Reputation: 10852

    Jul 2, 2019, 11:57 AM
    Maybe he has issues and pressures from his job or family, I don't know but I do know that things are not working to YOUR liking and he seems unwilling to meet you half way to address the issues. 5 years is an awfully long time to end things and make adjustments but that's what I think you should do at this point, or take a vacation from each other with no strings attached.

    Whatever his issues maybe he needs it more than you do to get his priorities straight. A break may be good for you both and you can find things that you enjoy and meet new people.

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