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chatica18 · Jan 26, 2010, 12:57 PM

Threads merged.

Please keep all questions regarding the same issue in the same thread.

Hi, resently I started a relationship, I am so jelous that I am going crazy.
My boyfriend just asked for time by himself once. Now he is acting indiferent and I can stand it, I don't want to feel like stucking him. What can I do?

I wish · Jan 26, 2010, 01:04 PM

Sounds like you scared him away with your insecurities.

More information please...

How old are you guys?

Why were you jealous?

How long have you been together?

What explanation did he give when he asked for time and space?

chatica18 · Jan 26, 2010, 01:06 PM

I don't trust him at all, he woks for a club, have too many girls all over him. He said that he only wants to be with me but I don't believe a single word that he says. I don't know how to act with him because I am always upset.

I wish · Jan 26, 2010, 01:11 PM

Why torture yourself? Get out of the relationship.

No trust = No relationship

CarrotTalker · Jan 26, 2010, 01:11 PM

Sounds like you both might possibly have self-image issues and also that you both seem to have a communication problem.

What makes it hard for you to believe what he tells you?

chatica18 · Jan 26, 2010, 01:12 PM

I don't trust him at all, he woks for a club, have too many girls all over him. He said that he only wants to be with me but I don't believe a single word that he says. I don't know how to act with him because I am always upset.

ohsohappy · Jan 26, 2010, 01:22 PM

Then leave him. If it's not something you can deal with and you can't learn to communicate with him then there's no reason for you to stick around. I wouldn't be surprised if he eventually did leave because of your behavior. You either learn to trust him or you don't and you leave. It's pretty simple if you think about it. Honestly, it's your insecurities that are the problem, not necessarily him.

Devorameira · Jan 26, 2010, 01:38 PM

Odds are that you have officially ran him off. I'm not sure if you'll get a second change or not.

You said you don’t trust him, but the only reason you listed was that he worked at a club and there were girls there around him all the time. Unless he’s actually cheated on you in the past, there’s no reason for you to let the “green-eyed monster” out.

Jealousy is actually a reflection of your own insecurity; Jealousy will kill (may have already killed) your relationship unless you put an end to it before it becomes your disease. You know why, because jealous people tend to behave badly being misled by their fears – you start saying things you don’t mean and start having suspicious thoughts you actually believe in. The only way to have a healthy relationship is for you to control your jealousy.

Love and trust go hand in hand. If you know in your heart that your boyfriend isn't a cheater, then it is just right that you trust him not to break your heart.

-----------------------------

Trust in what you love, continue to do it, and it will take you where you need to go. - Natalie Goldberg

It takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it. - Anonymous

To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved. ~ George MacDonald

ohsohappy · Jan 26, 2010, 05:54 PM

Yep, I'd run off too if someone was always accusing me of doing something I wasn't doing.

Romefalls19 · Jan 26, 2010, 07:41 PM

You are way too jealous, if he's smart he is gone for good. You need to work on your own insecurities

roxypox · Jan 26, 2010, 08:19 PM

Sorry to say hon, but the problem isn't with him. Its with you.

You really need to do some good old soul searching! You are the one with the insecurities, and from what you are telling us it really seems that you have scared him away.

like I wish said: no trust = no relationship!

One thing is to feel insecure once in a WHILE... but the way your describing it it seems like its ALL THE TIME.

I think you need to come to terms with this and even fix these insecurities...