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J tower · May 6, 2007, 07:14 PM

Hi I'm J tower and I will give you a quick run down on my current situation. My ex asked for a break about a month and a half ago, so I moved out and didn't have contact with her. She became angry and began asking me why I was playing games, I told her I would be straight forward from now on and we would have open lines of communication.

Over the last few weeks we have hung out a few times had fun a lot of fun when we did but she always tells me nothing has changed. I've reverted back to N.C and I don't call her until she calls me, so I don't seem needy.

I can tell lately she is getting stronger and I feel her now slipping away for real now. I am unsure of what to do when she does call, I am thinking about actually not returning her next call for at least a day or 2 after she calls me.

She at first would say were on a break but not seeing other people now she is saying I don't even know what were up to. I am a security blanket and she is having her cake and eating it to.

So my question is what should I do the next time she calls if she does? I do want her back and I have been working on myself and improving my own well being so I'm doing some things right.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated, thank you.

J tower · May 6, 2007, 07:27 PM

Oh anyway I meant to actually introduce myself...

This seems like a very cool community and I thought it would be fun to come into the mix. I'm 30 years old from vancouver b.c and I'm a actor slash personal trainer, that's about it for now.

Looking forward to making some new friends and learning in the process.

npole15 · May 6, 2007, 07:33 PM

My opinion is that you tell her that. If you agreed to be upfront from now forth, don't you think that you should be? It would be a good idea to tell her that you still want her- women like to be pursued, as long as it is not too creepy. Let her know that you want to be with her and you don't want a break from her, but if she wants to continue the break/ break-up, then you would would appreciate if she would keep her distance and allow you time to get over her. It is not fair to you (no matter how hopeful you are that she will change her mind) that she strings you along at a distance and goes out with other men.

J tower · May 6, 2007, 07:42 PM

I know what your saying but she does play games herself somewhat, I don't want to show her my cards. At the end of the day she knows I love her, by me telling her that it's just going to push her away, I think I'm going to go with my gut on this one.

I will not call unless she calls, I'm just not sure if I will pick up her calls or will I wait a few days to get back to her. If I don't do this how is she supposed to ever second guess herself, if you know that you can have something once you snap your fingers why would you want it back. If you know you can have someone right back what's to stop you from going out and finding out if the grass is greener?

npole15 · May 6, 2007, 07:45 PM

Right... except if you tell her you want her all or nothing at all, that would pretty much let her know that she can't just "snap her fingers", but it also skips all of the game playing that destroys relationships. Sounds like you had your mind made up before you asked the question. Good luck with whatever you try to do