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jayrel · Apr 13, 2008, 07:20 PM

Hi, I've just been dumped by my girlfriend of 9 years, we've never really separated before, she was at first telling me that she needed a time out and that she didn't know what she wanted anymore but I received a text message about 1 week ago telling me it was over and to move on, we've seen each other once in the past month, at first when she said it was over I called her frantically but she wouldn't pick up the phone but she did reply via text messages, but now I haven't tried to make any contact with her at all for 6 days now but I also haven't had a reply as yet. Does anyone out there think she will contact me or not, it has been a 9 year relationship after all, surely it's not all lost.

PLEASE HELP, PLEASE!! :(

talaniman · Apr 13, 2008, 07:37 PM

9 years, wow, What has changed recently? Just curious, why have you never married, and are there kids in the picture? How old are you both?

Homegirl 50 · Apr 13, 2008, 07:40 PM

Nine years is a long time to date someone. How old are the two of you?

Izannah · Apr 13, 2008, 07:44 PM

Nine years and she gave no explanation? Has anything in her behavior changed over the past few months? Years?

I would think that for anyone to walk away from a nine year relationship there has GOT to be a reason. Take a long, hard, OBJECTIVE look at your relationship, especially over the last year and maybe you'll see something that wasn't obvious to you before.

Sorry that you are having to go through this. I hope you have a strong support system. If not, I'm sure the fine folks of AMHD are willing to help! Best of luck to you.

jayrel · Apr 14, 2008, 10:06 AM

Originally Posted by jayrel

Hi, I've just been dumped by my girlfriend of 9 years, we've never really seperated before, she was at first telling me that she needed a time out and that she didn't know what she wanted anymore but I recieved a text message about 1 week ago telling me it was over and to move on, we've seen each other once in the past month, at first when she said it was over I called her frantically but she wouldn't pick up the phone but she did reply via text messages, but now I haven't tried to make any contact with her at all for 6 days now but I also haven't had a reply as yet. does anyone out there think she will contact me or not, it has been a 9 year relationship after all, surely it's not all lost.

PLEASE HELP, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:(

Hi, we've been seeing each other since we were 19 year olds and now we are 28, I was looking forward to moving onto the next step and getting married and having kids but there's nothing I can say or do at this moment in time to get her to change her mind and come back. I just don't know what to do?

Thanks!

Homegirl 50 · Apr 14, 2008, 10:11 AM

Maybe she got tired of waiting for the next step(9 years is a long time) or maybe she has just outgrown you. I don't know. But if her mind is made up, the best thing for you to do is accept it and move on. You can't make someone want you if they don't.

talaniman · Apr 14, 2008, 10:40 AM

Click on the links in my signature, for some good suggestions about what to do when the relationship is over. Let me know if any of it applies to you. Also know it will take time, to fill the hole in your soul. Sorry for your loss, but there is a big world out there, waiting for you to explore it. When your ready.