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    Deadwithouther's Avatar
    Deadwithouther Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jul 8, 2008, 12:15 PM
    How do I get her back
    I love her and she use to love me and now she said she doesn't know what love is I really want her back we had awsome times to gether and now she's gone help me please:mad: :( :confused:
    BMAULDIN's Avatar
    BMAULDIN Posts: 3, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #2

    Jul 8, 2008, 12:27 PM
    You let her go. I know it hurts. But give her time. And maybe she will come back. Try to be just friends. Let her see you as a friend then maybe one day. More. I hope everything works out I know it is hard. But let me know how it goes
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
    Expert
     
    #3

    Jul 8, 2008, 12:34 PM
    There is no magic way to get someone back, often in fact if you chase after and stalk them it chases them away more. You can wait for a bit and hope she will want to come back but at some point if she does not, you have to move on and find someone else. Or you end up the old man with 20 cats who is still waiting after 40 years.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Jul 8, 2008, 12:57 PM
    All you can do is let her go, don't contact her at all and allow yourself to heal. Use the 4 stickies on the front page to help heal and learn of some proactive steps to take.
    Chery's Avatar
    Chery Posts: 3,666, Reputation: 698
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #5

    Jul 8, 2008, 02:14 PM
    Man, if I had 5 cents for every time I read a post like this, I'd be a millionairess now. You sound like a teenager to me who does not even know what a real relationship is, so correct me if I'm wrong.

    May I suggest that you read the first four stickies in the relationship's section - they will show you that you are not the only one in the world with this problem,and it will not be your last break-up. But I promise you will survive it and learn from it and go on with your life.

    What did you do before you met her? You were probably out chasing other girls and she was the one that let herself be caught. Too bad for you, because for some reason, she wound up not being the right one, or it was meant not to last long, but still helped you learn a lesson. Remember that the first love will not likely ever be your last love - but since it's a new experience, we want to hold on to it as long as possible - which makes us needy and that's not healthy.

    What's with the name 'Deadwithouther'?? What on earth makes her more special than any other girl in the universe if you gave them a chance?? I bet this is the first girl that let you kiss her or maybe even get physically a little closer - so you discovered a whole new world out there and like it. That does not mean that she is the best thing that ever happened to you - there are more girls out there - and there is a lot more that you can learn. Above all, you need to learn how to communicate, respect, and get to know each other's common interests. Then you need to take her out to places where you can have some fun. As a matter of fact, I would get to know her and what her interests are and share your interests before thinking of getting physical.

    AND, never, ever, place another person into the center of your universe... that leaves you open for more pain in the future because no girl likes a clinger and a needy person. Also wait until you've know each other for at least 3-5 months before you think of using the word 'love' because this is something that grows with the relationship.

    Next time, please do me a favor and tell me how old you both are, and how long you have been dating.

    Sorry that this sounded like a lecture, but your short plea for help with so little information didn't leave much room for pinpointing any particular issue so I had to start somewhere.

    Hope this helped a little.
    snowalps's Avatar
    snowalps Posts: 141, Reputation: 7
    Junior Member
     
    #6

    Jul 8, 2008, 02:32 PM
    Just read your q. do you even know why she suddenly said that? Was there some kind of fight or misunderstanding? U know what buddy, most of the times we don't discuss about the actual meat, we just wait in anticipation of a response or initiation from the other person. This may work well or won't matter so much in friendship, but when it comes to relation, the very first thing you should do is talk your heart out and discuss the issue that is bothering both of your minds.. mebbe its just some ego?mebbe its something else? Or mebbe something totally different! Only you guys would know what it is and if you want the lost time to come back, you need to talk and sort it out while letting aside your inhibitions. Try and convince both yourselves in to doing this. That's my advice if you really want it.

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