Just a brief background.. My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year. He graduated from college this past semester, and moved back home to begin working as a teacher. Meanwhile, I'm still in school, and that is about 4 hours away from home (we're both from the same city).

His current job situation is really stressful and a giant mess, and there is no way he can leave - his job requires him for 2 years. The school where he works is really disorganized when it came to giving him the job, and the tasks that he would fulfill. They told him that he would be working there 3 days before school started. To add to it, he graduated with a degree in elementary education, but the school has him teaching 8th grade writing and math (which is out of his certification area). The school administration and other teachers aren't much help in getting him situated either. We talk every night, but it always turns into conversation of how bad his day was, how he feels defeated and beaten after his work day. I listen to him, and my heart breaks to hear about it all. He is starting to regret his past 4 years of college, and I feel like his job is killing his desire to teach. He wishes he did something else in college. And for as long as I've know him, he has loved teaching, so I know that this isn't him.

Should I tell him that he should pursue something else? To just stick it out? What can I do to be the supportive girlfriend and help him through this? I would really appreciate any advice.

Because this is his first teaching assignment, and the school is disorganized, and he is teaching an area he is not certified in, it is no wonder he is discouraged. You are being supportive by just listening to him every night. Being four hours away, there is not much else you can do other than be a sounding board for him. And that is all he expects , and all you should be doing. He needs to vent. The last thing you should attempt is tell him what he should do about his career. Just let him know you love and support whatever decision he makes. Sometimes these things work themselves out. But believe me, you are already being much more supportive then you think just by being there for him.

ERROR: You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to beachloverjohn again.


I think all you can do is be a good listener, without trying to fix him or make him feel better about his job. That's really his problem to adjust to and resolve, but after venting he needs encouragement to keep handling his business, as he is the only one to to find solutions and be happy with himself and his situation, or change it.

I understand your concerns and the helplessness you may feel for not being able to change him, or his circumstances, but let him vent, and then talk of positive things.

If he is a big crybaby, or a sourpuss all the time, that's his problem, and you have to think if he is worth it, or not.

Maybe this is a preview of how he deals with his reality, so listen, and pay attention, so you can learn about him.

You can only listen and be a shoulder for him to cry on... nothing else.

If he isn't teaching within his certification, then I would think that he could easily get out of the required 2 years. Has he even talked to anyone about the fact that he isn't certified to teach 8th grade?