Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Oct 26, 2008, 01:48 PM
    How I can bring my girlfrieto my life as I love her so much
    Hi I been with my girlfriend for two and halfe years, but we had a hard life with money ! And I was warking at the factory and also she been doing same jobs every time she works at deffrient places and is was hard for her .she was working at nights and days 12 hours and also weekends , when she was working days shift she has to wake up 4 am and get 2 bus to get to work so I was feeling very bad and feeling sorry for her ! She is pretty and really looking great ! So I was thinking this life is not her life !
    So I diccided to tell her you can't do that hard jobs and lets we think about something that be easy for you and sute you .
    I told her why you not going to college and learning hairdressing ? She was thinking she can't do it at the begianing but after 2 week she said yes she will do .also she from lithunanian and I am from uk . So we tried to get a course here in uk but it was hard and needed lots money . So we tried at her country and there was cheap so we booked for next six month so she can start the course !
    So the rent for the house we used pay both we changed and we rent a room shared with other people .so we can save some money for the course , I was paying everything rent and food and bills so she can save money for her course , fainally she worked hard even weekends and lots over times so she can save some money , and she did .
    So time come close for her course it was in June and she lifet me in June for six month .and we use to talk every day on skype everything was normal !but 6 weeks a go she went to USA to finish her course there , but she never told me about this that she going there to finish her course!! Well I was trying to ring her but never got respond from her ! After that I called her sister and she told me that my girlfriend went to USA to finish her course! I really upset! so I emailed my girlfriend and she reply and said that she feel sorry for never told me ! But I was angry first but still told her that I love her and that stuff , as I am really do love her so much !well I send her lots email about 40 emails but I got only 1 emails back !
    Again I was feeling why she not talking to me and I asked her if she still love me or she got new life and think about something else? She replyed and she was angry and she was saying that she will not back to uk and even her country because she hate uk and no one love her ! So I really upset and been crying all time . Becose I want her back to me ! She even emailed her sister been saying that she will never back there to her country too ! We don't know why ! Also she been saying on the last emails that she will never cheak her mail anymore ! So she can not hear from us at all ! And she said good by to me and she will never forget me! Please help me what shell I do to change her mind and bring her back to my life??
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Oct 26, 2008, 03:44 PM

    You sent 40 emails? You are trying way to hard and as she pulls back you are going in further. Furthermore, you the did morally right thing by introducing her to a better life, but when you offer someone something better you have to be ready for them to take it and not look back. I think you have to come to terms with the fact that she's gone, and the truth is she's already out of the relationship.
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #3

    Oct 26, 2008, 03:51 PM

    Thanks chuff. But I think I better try still may she change her mind ? Also she was OK till yestarday she told me good by !
    We were normal but I was feeling she w a bit cold though ! Hope you help me more
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Oct 26, 2008, 03:56 PM

    It seems that there is nothing for you to do but accept the fact that it is over. She cross you out of her life and left without looking back. It seems like she cut everybody out of her life, you and her family. You can't change her mind and really there is nothing left for you to do.

    Sorry this happen to you but one day you will be able to move to someone else. Don't send anymore emails because as of now she don't want to be bother and she's enjoying her life in a new country and as I stated eariler moved on.

    You can survive this because what don't kill you only makes you stronger.
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:02 PM

    Thanks liz28 but wihle she was there she sended 3 emails and we were OK but I was feeling she was a bit cold ,
    So I asked her what is going on and bla bla .
    But she got angry and she send me last email and saying good by ! But also if I knew her phone number or address I will go to see her and tell her how I am feeling , that time may be she change her mind ! But is any one know how I get her number or address please ?
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:18 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by sarwat1 View Post
    thanks chuff. but i think i better try still may she change her mind ? also she was ok till yestarday she told me good by !
    we was normal but i was feeling she w a bit cold tho ! hope you help me more
    Sarwat, I would love to be wrong. I would love nothing more then to admit to you that I made a mistake, but I didn't. I have no emotional investment in your situation so I see it clearly and clearly speaking she has no interest in your relationship. For one, the relationship is long distance. Those work like .001% of the time. Second, and I completely side with you and your intentions on this, but you offered her a life she couldn't see for herself. You truly were the good guy, the knight in shining armor, but once she took that life, she knew she was capable of more. Third, you sent her to the US, and although I'm not a world traveler, I know that people literally die trying to get to this country. Even those that don't and return to their home country have seen another aspect of life, and tend to want more or look at the world differently. But she's originally from Lithuanian, and if you take someone from put them in even the poorest neihborhood in the US, I'm telling you there's not a comparison, she's staying here. Third, even if you were with her, look at how your acting, you are contacting her at a 40 to 1 ratio. 40 TO 1! You as the man are supposed to be strong. That is not strong behavior. Women like men who are confident in themselves, and constantly needing her is not confident. She is not going to change her mind, it is you who needs to change his and put yourself and your life back together.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #7

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:23 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by sarwat1 View Post
    thanks liz28 but wihle she was there she sended 3 emails and we was ok but i was feeling she was a bit cold ,
    so i asked her what is going on and bla bla .
    but she got angry and she send me last email and saying good by ! but also if i knew her phone number or address i will go to see her and tell her how i am feeling , that time may be she change her mind ! but is any one know how i get her number or address please ?
    You don't know the address or phone number to your girlfriend of 2 years?
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
    Ultra Member
     
    #8

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:24 PM

    You can do a search on internet but some sites charge a fee.

    At this time I really don't think if you go and see her it would change anything. It's really time for you to move on because regardless of what you do, you can't make someone come back to you or get someone back when they don't want to get back with you.

    She is ignoring you now and if you keep bothering someone that don't want to be bother, it can be consider as a form of harassment. What do you think would happen if you talk to her on the phone or show up at her door?
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #9

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:36 PM

    Well chuff she moved to USA how I have her number or address ? Also is killing me really but her sister told me we shuld give her time and wait till she sort her life out and will see what is will happened ! I will wait though for next 2 weeks if got no respond I will try to forget her too !
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #10

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:39 PM
    liz28 thanks I did serched all sites even I paid money but couldn't find anthing for her name ! If I knew her address I am sure will make her to change her mind because we been togethr long time and I know how to talk to her and cool her down .
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
    Ultra Member
     
    #11

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:46 PM

    Sorry but if you can't find he number than you won't be able to get her address. If you couldn't through to her by email I am still not sure what reasoning you could do in person.What would be the difference?

    When someone wants to be with you, they will.
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #12

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:54 PM

    liz28 , well that is the problem I can't get her number because she only new in USA and she maybe don't have enough money to by a mobile also I think she don't have internet at home I think she going some where to check her emails I don't know where though . She may pay for it ! Or she may even not in USA at all really I don know she may lie to me ! Because the emails I got form her when I checked the time it was her country time come on ! Do you know what I mean ?
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #13

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:54 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by sarwat1 View Post
    well chuff she moved to USA how i have her number or address ? also is killing me realy but her sister told me we shuld give her time and wait till she sort her life out and will see what is will happend ! i will wait tho for next 2 weeks if got no respond i will try to forget her too !
    Yes I know she moved, but when someone moves they usually give you the phone number and address where they are going, and after 2 years with you, if she didn't provide those two critical things then maybe... just maybe... just possibly maybe she's blowing you off. Plus she gave you 1 email after you stalked her with 40. Her sister is not her. I remain great friends with my ex girlfriends sister and when I saw her a couple weeks ago she was still encouraging me to speak with my ex, but she is not the ex. How can you not see that she is completely ignoring you and you are not giving her any space? What do you think she'd say if you did get her phone number... the one she didn't give you, and you called her? How would that be considered a good thing to her?
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #14

    Oct 26, 2008, 04:57 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by sarwat1 View Post
    liz28 , well that is the problem i can't get her number becouse she only new in USA and she maybe dont have enough money to by a mobile also i think she dont have internet at home i think she going some where to check her emails i dont know where tho . she may pay for it ! or she may even not in USA at all really i don know she may lie to me ! becouse the emails i got form her when i checked the time it was her country time come on ! do you know what i mean ?
    No, nobody knows what you mean at this point. Is this a real relationship, because it sounds more like an internet relationship.
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #15

    Oct 26, 2008, 05:03 PM

    chuff you right do you know when she movd she never told me ! I tried to ring her she never answer me so I had no choice I rang her sister and she told me that my girlfrind gon to USA and I shock it ! So I asked how I can contact her she said that she got only email and I aske can I have it so that way I got her email too ! Also the reson I need to speck to her just want to tell her what I had done wrong to her and what is happened . Because still not clear what I have done wrong so she can live me !
    sarwat1's Avatar
    sarwat1 Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #16

    Oct 26, 2008, 05:07 PM

    Choff is not internet we been together for 2 and halif years in same bed . The problem I don't know myself too what has happened she just been like this!! Why she drive me crazy !
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #17

    Oct 26, 2008, 05:18 PM

    How can you type what I'm reading and in any think she wants to be with you?
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
    Ultra Member
     
    #18

    Oct 26, 2008, 06:48 PM

    I have been there my friend

    When I had my 2nd girlfriend I got her a wonderful job in a grea company.

    We were dating for 5 years.
    She then leaves me for a CEO

    It really does make you laugh.
    And the 40 emails not good :)

    But know this my friend.
    If it wasn't now. It will be later.
    A girl like that was just waiting to get out.
    And if she would have stayed with you.
    She still would have found a way to go
    So don't beat yourself up too much

    I wish you all the best
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,298, Reputation: 10854
    Expert
     
    #19

    Oct 28, 2008, 09:01 AM

    As sad as this is, the next move is hers, as she has disappeared from your life on purpose, and this is the time you take to work on yourself, heal, and regroup, and let her do the same.

    Sorry for your loss.
    Nicote22's Avatar
    Nicote22 Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #20

    Oct 28, 2008, 09:05 AM

    Hey hey I'm in a long distance relationship and it works... 001 isn't a good statistic... but yea anyway you should move on... plenty of fish in the sea...

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

I lost the love of my life, my life doesn't make sense anymore [ 4 Answers ]

I lost mybestfriend and love of my life 2 weeks ago and I don't understand my lifes purpose anymore, we had a connection so strong this doesn't make sense, everything I did in my over the past 22 years was for me however the constant knowing we would be together, we had 3 years to go before...

No love in my life! [ 5 Answers ]

Hi, so my boyfriend isn't a very affectionate person, but I have to have it in a relationship. I need to be kissed, and hugged, and for him to tell me I'm his everything, but he doesn't. He actually does the complete opposite. I have told him, and all he says is "thats just the way iam, i have...

Love of my life [ 3 Answers ]

Will I get married to the love of my life, Jason?

Am I with the love of my life [ 1 Answers ]

My husband just got remarried for the second time and I want to know if we are going to be happy for many years.

The Love of My LIfe - GONE! [ 1 Answers ]

Hello, Ok, so here goes... I've dated a few girls in my early life... but recently my ex of a definite few days, but she was on the fence for a couple of weeks just broke up with me after 4 years. Reason being, she just wasn't as happy as we used to be. You see I have that jealousy...


View more questions Search