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Aelethyia · Dec 9, 2008, 04:43 PM

My boyfriend and I have been going out for eleven months now (we are both each others' firsts). In the beginning of the relationship I became aware of his friendship with a woman he met in an online game (she lives across the country). They became friends two and a half years ago and are such good friends that they know each others' real names and cell phone numbers. They would text each other about their daily lives and such frequently. I let this all slide, because I thought I had nothing to worry about, and after all, they've been friends long before I came in the picture.

In a discussion about sex with my boyfriend, he mentioned that his online friend has a hard time climaxing. I asked him how he knew and he eventually spilled that they'd confide in each other about their sex lives and problems.

This is making me feel uncomfortable. Is my boyfriend emotionally cheating on me by confiding his problems with another woman? Shouldn't he be talking to me instead of her?

TrueFaith · Dec 9, 2008, 04:47 PM

I would not say he was. Seems like he is just talking to a friend. And that's it.

If he was telling her problems about you. Then that would be a different story
But remember they have known each other for 2 years

So they probable are friends

You just have to trust him. That once he is with you that's it.

I don't think you should worrie about this too much. As everyone is allowed to have friends.

If you find him talking dirty to her. Or saying that he loves her.
Then yeah you can step in and go I will not stand for this.

But otherwise just relax :) and enjoy your boy

neverme · Dec 9, 2008, 06:20 PM

Ya I agree with TrueFaith. As long as these things were said as two friends discussing problems there's nothing wrong with it. We all need a friend to confide in, and as we know, sometimes that's easier to do from the screen of a computer than face to face. Trust him. It is the essence of a relationship, without it (and a few more key ingredients) your not going to succeed.

Best of Luck.

wolfgangqpublic · Dec 9, 2008, 06:28 PM

As a guy, if I'm confiding in a woman about sexual issues and history, I am not intending to pursue a sexual relationship with them. And there are one or two women I occasionally discuss this with, and I also talk to them about deeper problems - since they are close friends and nothing more.

jjwoodhull · Dec 9, 2008, 06:34 PM

If this is the only example, then I don't think you have anything to worry about. A lot of people confide in their close friends of the opposite sex, because they want the perspective of the other sex.

friend4u178 · Dec 9, 2008, 06:49 PM

If he was emotionally cheating he wouldn't have confided in you what they were talking about.

821char5 · Nov 1, 2012, 11:18 AM

He is cheating on you, I would dump him.

Gamed · Nov 1, 2012, 06:10 PM

To be honest I have many friends I met online that I know their real names and or numbers.
Its really not a big deal ,and to be honest gaming friends are different than normal friends. With gaming friendships gender, race, physical appearance, past ,all don't matter the only thing we can judge each other on is our voice for the most part and our personality, who we are. So when they talk for over 2 years in that kind of environment it doesn't surprise me they are that comfortable just talking to each other about their problems.