I need some clarity & advise, please.

Ive been in a long distance relationship for 5 years. Never experienced that before.

We are both successful artists, I am 10 years older. We spend most of the time together, but sometimes apart for weeks at a time. The distance has been trying, but we have made it work and the time together has been amazing and special & unique.

She is a very narcissistic person & is obsessed with fame & fortune. Is heavily into "The Secret", self-help, and is extremely career driven.

She is always flip-flopping about where she wants to be & what she wants to do, but knows she wants to be the best at her talents.

This has made it extremely difficult to make any concrete plans together, although we love each other.

She broke up with me over the phone a few days ago & says she doesn't want a relationship, wants to be single & needs time. In the same breath, she says she loves me, and I am her best friend, part of the family and wishes to remain friends. She comments on how "amazing" I am.

I have spent countless hours on the phone & otherwise supporting her with patience and love. She says "Cause thats what boyfriends do"

From what I know about her past, she has never had anyone true, mostly flings & bad relationships, in fact I was the only one that has met & spent loving times with her family.

She comes from a selfish and dysfunctional broken family. Mom became a lesbian and sister became a prostitute, drug addict during her teenage years. She went traveling around the world after that for 5 years to escape. Then became super driven.

I am really in a lot of pain & have told her that I was willing to do whatever it takes to be with her & emotionally pleaded to make things work, and that I don't want to lose her. She's says its too late needs to do this & be single. She says that in time she will be able to truly explain why she's doing this. She even tries to give me advise in healing, while saying she wishes the she could take all of my pain.

I feel now, I am out of site, out of mind & devastated as I have been so loving and supported and have been instrumental in where she is. She has also reinforced her love right to the very last week.

Now I can't sleep or eat. I feel like I just don't know what hit me or will ever get any answers.

Thanks for listening.