I ve been with my girlfriend for 5 yrs. Recent after I proposed, she inadvertently showed me a pic of single male "old friend" from her home town, on her phone. She lied about who he was. Said it was a cousin from previous marriage . I then looked at phone records and found she had been texting ( 1000 plus texts and pics) over the past 3 months. Looking at the records she was texting early morning, sometimes all day, consecutive days, and whle we were in bed together . She swears she loves me, she has no interest in "old friend ", tells me they just talked about the past. She swears she has had no physical contact, and NO sexual interest in this other guy. She cannot tell any specifics of conversations, simply that they talked about sunsets/ growing up together/ sisters passing/ chit chat . I am confused , angry and embarrassed. She insist that I need to get over it and deal with it. She insist there was never any inappropriate text.

This boils down to the trust you have for her. You either trust that there was no intimacy, or you don't. This is where you decide.

is it reseaoable to insists she quicks texting this guy? Is it reasonable for her to continue her texting with him? Where are the boundaries of a committed relationship? I am trouble she text him while in bed with me shortly after making love. Additionally what compels a woman to have such a vigorous texting exchange with another man while she is planning a wedding in the very near future ?

Many of things contribute to someone texting an "old friend". Typically it's to seek that in which is missing. It's not selfish to ask that she quit texting him. It is selfish to control or compell her not to do so. If you are bothered by it, talk to her. If she cannot bring herself to stop. Pack your bags and leave.

The question is. Where do you draw the line? When does your trust become broken? Do you want to spend the rest of your relationship looking over your shoulder wondering who she's texting?

These are all things for you to decide and only you have the answer. Like I said, it all boils down to the trust you have for her.