All right so my girlfriend and I had been dating for 8 months or so and we started to have a lot of serious arguments about the future and I ended up breaking up with her. Even immediately after breaking up with her I couldn't come up with a great reason as to why I did it other than I felt we didn't have a future. We kept in contact and even had sex a few times after the breakup but both agreed that we needed to move on.

Fast forward about 6weeks later. I have come to the realization that I really love this girl. I was fine for about 2-3 weeks and then it hit me like a mack truck. I have been overcome with extreme depression and anxiety and guilt over breaking her heart and that I might lose her.

After a completely sleepless night 2 nights ago I decided enough was enough and I called her up and told her to come to my house and talk to me and it was important. I sat her down and told her how I felt. That I loved her, that I made a mistake and that I wasn't ready to give up on us.

It turns out she met a guy online about a week or 2 after we broke up and started a dating/sexual relationship with him. Obviously the guy was a rebound and I have no reason to really be angry with her over it because we were broken up. I basically caused this. But the thing is.. The whole time we were broken up I couldn't even bring myself to meet another girl let alone sleep with them, while at the same time she immediately started dating a guy she barely knew.

After finding out this information I told her that I still love her and want to be with her and that in the end I want her to be happy. So if she wants a relationship with this new guy I would step aside and let her move on. But if she loves me and wants us to try again that she couldn't keep seeing this guy. My reasoning is that is isn't fair to me or the other guy for her to be seeing us both. I just couldn't leave myself in this constant state of limbo. I need to either completely erase any thought of having her in my life, or give the relationship all I got.

She made her decision very quickly and texted her new guy telling him that she couldn't see him anymore and she needed to be alone. Etc etc.

So it seems as if I should be celebrating and very happy now that I have seemingly won back the girl I love. However now I can't shake this constantly high level anxiety and desperation I have. It has made it hard to sleep, eat, be productive at work. Its basically affecting everything I do its so bad. I can't stop thinking about the fact that she slept with this other guy so quickly after we broke up. I know its none of my business. I know its my fault that this happened, but what do I do? I am so confused and lost right now any advice would be good.

You are not responsible for her actions just yours. You did what you had to, now its for her to decide what she wants, but I have to tell you guy, you are in much deeper than she is. She may not be that excited about either one of you.

Just because YOUR feelings are intense, and desperate, don't assume hers are the same. What if its just YOU?

"I couldn't come up with a great reason as to why I did it other than I felt we didn't have a future"

I guess that was your gut. Huh?

You didn't want it when you had it, now that's it gone you want it.
As soon as she's w/someone else.

Stay with your gut.

Time to go NC, dry your eyes, pull up your boot straps & move on.

There's lots of girls.

People always want what they can't have. You let her go for a reason, and then when after time you realized, '****, I love her, I want her back' Uh no. Doesn't work that way.

As a girl, it hurts to be told that they're not someone's future, because after all, that what we're looking for, someone to enjoy our life with side-by-side.

You broke her heart, she needed someone, and she went to someone that made her feel like she was worth it again.

You took her back. Why didn't you think about whether you could handle her having another sexual partner if you two got back together?

And you gave her an ultimatum, you or the internet dude... she chose you, and that's still not enough? She wants to be with you. If you truly love her, get over it. People have sex, and you two weren't even together.