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lostsoul29 · Apr 10, 2008, 02:53 PM

Me and my ex are friends but we still love each were good friends well more then friends but less than lovers seeing that he has a girlfriend he's been with for a while. We talk for hours at night but... it seems he can't have a conversation with me without bringin up how much he wants to make love to me and I always tell him noo then he says "when we hang out im gonna rape you". Every time he asks to hang out with me I always come up with a excuse because I don't know I kind of thinkk if I was to not want to have sex with him then he would rape me he is very aggressive and is known for his temper. It sucks I love him I really do and I loved hangin out with him but now I won't cause I don't want to put myself in that position. I'm scarred to hang out with one of my bestest friends. I tried explaining to him if I hang out with him then I'm not having sex with him but he says that I won't be able to resist because of how much I love him.. and I know I don't want to have sex with him or anyone else cause I'm not ready but I feel like if I do hang out with him then its just going to happen because of what we feel for each other orrrr if I hang out with him and I do say noo then he will get aggressive and actually rape me... I don't know its like a lose lose situation I just want to hang out with him without anything physical but I don't know if I can cause I'm so drawn to him

COOKIE MONSTER · Apr 10, 2008, 03:25 PM

I'm sorry but I would start no contact its not a good situation that your in

1,you need to get over this guy and move on which you can't do being in constant contact
2,if you are scared of him and what he could do stay away from him
3,he has a girlfriend how would she feel if she new what he was saying to you
4,find anew friend you don't need a friend like him

Read what you have written hear what would you say if that was your friend that posted that??

You deserve better,go out have fun and forget about this nut case nobody says things like that joking its not funny stay away from him if you don't your going to put yourself in a situation you wish you hadn't

START NO CONTACT MEANING NO CALLS,TEXIS,EMAILS,NO HANGING OUT,OR ANYTHING

chuff · Apr 10, 2008, 03:38 PM

Are you kidding me? What the hell kind of pick up line is "I want to rape you?" This guy has some problems and needs help. I'd recommend some to him and be supportive of him trying to change and I'd only do that via the phone... and that might be asking too much.

talaniman · Apr 10, 2008, 04:30 PM

You'll just have to trust me on this one, but a guy who threatens rape, is not a friend, and is setting you up, because he can always say he told you of his intentions, and you came to him any way. Now he get what he wants, and you get hurt, so get this psycho out of your life, anyway you can. He is dangerous.

COOKIE MONSTER · Apr 10, 2008, 06:04 PM

Yep he's not right in the head 1bit

Blaze194 · Apr 10, 2008, 06:58 PM

Get away from him as fast as possible, if he is saying he is wanting/going to rape you then he is messed up in the head and might even do it, not worth the risk. You deserve to be cared for and loved by a decent guy not someone who thinks about raping you.

ihatewestseneca · Apr 10, 2008, 07:38 PM

I took the whole "im gonna rape you" thing as sarcasm... I don't know if anybody else did. But if I was flirting with a girl on the phone, I'd probably say something like that, but it would be a joke... I couldn't ever rape anyone.

Anyway, you shouldn't be talking to him anyway! Your relationship is over, start with No Contact. If he asks, just explain to him that its too painful to talk to him when you're trying to get over him.

ISneezeFunny · Apr 10, 2008, 08:04 PM

I see what westy's saying, but... for personal reasons, to me, rape can't be a joke.

As for the question asked... the entire time I was reading it, I was shaking my head and going "........."

... hope that sort of answered your question.

chuff · Apr 11, 2008, 04:37 AM

Originally Posted by ihatewestseneca

i took the whole "im gonna rape you" thing as sarcasm... i dunno if anybody else did. but if i was flirting with a girl on the phone, i'd probably say something like that, but it would be a joke... i couldn't ever rape anyone.

anyway, you shouldn't be talking to him anyway! your relationship is over, start with No Contact. if he asks, just explain to him that its too painful to talk to him when you're trying to get over him.

I'm serious when I ask this and this is not an attack but how exactly would you say that as flirting? I guess I just don't see how a woman could see that as flirting.

ihatewestseneca · Apr 11, 2008, 05:19 AM

Originally Posted by chuff

I'm serious when I ask this and this is not an attack but how exactly would you say that as flirting? I guess I just don't see how a woman could see that as flirting.

I can see how it can be strange, haha. But if I know a girl who is attractive, the next time we hang out I might say something along those lines in a Joking manner. As if to say, "you're so hot" but in a way most guys won't say it. I don't usually say "rape" but I might say something like, "im just gonna start making out with you next time i see you". But I wouldn't say it to a stranger, only someone who knows me, and knows my sense of humor. I'm very sarcastic.

Good question though, this way people won't think I'm a creep.

HistorianChick · Apr 11, 2008, 09:43 AM