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    Does Love exist? Is there such thing as love?

    Asked Jan 20, 2007, 01:11 AM 22 Answers
    I was wondering what is your opinion or thoughts on this situation, I went through a couple of months ago (in 2006).

    It was nearing the end of my first year at University, I was dancing on the last night the pub was open; suddenly, I saw a good-looking, kind of modest girl and I got the opportunity to dance with her inside the club. Then after we danced for what seemed to be an eternity in paradise, we went outside for a walk around campus, exchanging stories - getting to know each other and we walked back to our campus college - took her back to her room and I went back to mine.

    Later on (couple of days later or so), we had gotten to know each other and it had been raining outside, so we went out for a walk and she expressed her likeness of puddle-jumping. I was a bit shy to jump any puddles, but I walked over them anyway (good thing I had water proof shoes) :rolleyes: and after those sweet moments, we went back up to her room and just sat on her bed, talking - then there came that infamous silence, our eyes locked. She was looking at me and smiling, my heart was racing so fast - I couldn't believe it, and every instinct inside of me was screaming at me to go for it.

    BOOM. I had my first kiss, it was intense. The rush was unreal, I couldn't believe I was in an unending dream.:o

    Eventually, that dream crashed when she was sitting quietly in her room, I remember she felt guilty about what happened and in that moment, I realized that she was already in love with another guy - and it's a long distance relationship. Here's the kicker, she's due to marry him after University.

    I spent 10 months getting over her, built a wall around my damaged heart because I don't want to go through all that again. Guess what? She won't easily be forgotten because she's in one of my classes, and it seems like all I can do is just to ignore her. Life is never that easy.

    And now, I know I won't ever fall in love again, but I can like new girls but I've learned to be cautious and careful. Since then, I've never felt the same, all because of one girl; but I've learned to move on, and met new girls along the way. I don't think love exist, but hey might as well have fun meeting someone new.

    Last edited by Jogan2090; Jan 20, 2007 at 01:17 AM.
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    SouthernBelle06's Avatar
    SouthernBelle06 Posts: 166, Reputation: 83
    Junior Member

    Jan 20, 2007, 01:32 AM
    Yes, love exists and you will no doubt experience it one day. You had a bad experience here and you are feeling down, but you can't discredit all womankind and love altogether because of one girl who disappointed you. Not to minimize your feelings here, but this was probably so special to you because it was your first kiss. This was a very short term thing. You will experience so much more when you meet the right girl and have a real meaningful relationship.
    Helpful (1)
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,668, Reputation: 1707
    Uber Member

    Jan 20, 2007, 01:55 AM
    Oh, I can guarantee you will fall in love again. Yes, Love exists. There is so much out there. Believe me when I tell you. You will discover it again.

    Geoffersonairplane's Avatar
    Geoffersonairplane Posts: 1,195, Reputation: 286
    Ultra Member

    Jan 20, 2007, 08:12 AM
    Love does exist but it can be confused sometimes for other feelings such as lust.. but real love really does exist. Nobody can tell you that you are 'in love' you just know it. It is something I can't really put into words or at least I would find it difficult to describe. I also believe that you can fall in love more than once, either with the same person or with a new person. I am not sure of the concept of falling out of love because my take on this would be that if you were truly in love with someone, would you not carry the love inside for the rest of you life?

    An interesting question>? But not easy to answer.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 53,322, Reputation: 10829

    Jan 20, 2007, 09:13 AM
    When we are young and the world is new to us we discover feelings for the first time and they are so strong and powerful we can hardly stand it. But then LIFE shows us what reality is about and we start to pay closer attention to the things around us and are not so overwhelmed by it all and learn how to cope with people, places, and things on a level as to protect ourselves some what. We go through many trials and tribulations and thrills, and chills, along the way until one day we are awakened by one of those really clear realities that we love someone and are loved the same way in return. That's when the whole damn world changes and you could care less about anything except what you and yours are doing. How do you know your in love?? When you wake up 30 years and a few kids and gran-kids later and tell your still there, but somewhat gray headed partner, I LOVE YOU, STILL!!!
    Allheart's Avatar
    Allheart Posts: 1,639, Reputation: 436
    Ultra Member

    Jan 20, 2007, 09:30 AM
    Oh Jogan2090,

    What a memorable first kiss you have had. It brings a smile to my face, and someday, when you look back, it will for you as well. I don't even remember my first kiss, that may be because I was holding my breath so tight, it's possible I passed out, and would explain my not being able to remember.

    Oh love certainly does exsist and right now you are , whether you know it or not, traveling on the road towards it. All these life experiences that you are having along the way, will be of such benefit when you do get to the point of the road, where love is just there, waiting for you. Why do you have to go through bumps in the road, in order to get to the one who loves you and you love in return? Very good question (if I do say so myself LOL)
    Well, I am a believer that the bumps make you stronger, help you to get to know yourself better, so that when you reach that point in the road, where that special one has reached that same point, at that same time, you will be able to give, receive and know what true love actually is. You will know yourself so well, and be able to give of who you truly are.

    Right now, this may all be mubo jumbo for you, and that's okay. Just don't be discouraged, and it's okay to have your guard up a bit, and your eyes open, and your heart reserved for only that special someone. Nothing wrong with that. This is your growing time. This is your time, to go out there and explore, learn and by goodness, have fun! So smile, not only have you had the most memorable first kiss I have ever heard about, you are at a fantastic point in your life, where all you have to do, is be open to learning and experiencing. Go forth and enjoy!!

    All my best,
    Helpful (1)
    blazingsoulmonster's Avatar
    blazingsoulmonster Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    May 15, 2007, 07:20 PM
    Yes love does exsist, you might not think so but it is, and I no that it will be hard to get over because it was for me too. When I had my first everything with this guys, I felt as though we would be together forever,but that didn't happen soonly after he dumped me for another person he said I wasn't his type. I was upset for several months just like u , but I learned to move on, its hard but it will happen, I promise you have my word.

    Pvt orozco
    mckenzie134's Avatar
    mckenzie134 Posts: 647, Reputation: 67
    Senior Member

    May 16, 2007, 12:46 AM
    Love may exist but is mainly an illusion which is created with th right works. People believ you just love thm that much but normally there are reasons for someone to feel so dep for another person andive putthis down to the main fact of missing someone. Without thefeelingof missing someone there will not be a lot of LOVE, the main ingredient as a relationship unfolds is misssingthe other person and believingyou need them in your life andthis mainly ocurs when they leave. People will say I am so in love with him or her andthis may be true but is definitely created. Not sayingthere is Love but I don't really believe there is actual love without cetain points. Thismay sound hard to understand but I definitely believe if you are in arelationship you can make the other person who is interested in you that is the reasonthey arewith you to fall for you totally which tells themselves they are in lovewith you. Proof that love does not really exist is thefact that marriages break up because feelingschange ifLOVE was true then feelings would not change you would LOVEthat person forever. Yet saying all this I was truly in love with my ex before we decided to break up! But I understood the reasons I LOVED her they were notbecause she wasn't around I just liked her for who she was. I may be contradicting myself ere because I justsaid I was in LOVE which means it does exist but can be ard to find.

    Anyway after I've rambled on for a while down I suppose I've talked myself into believingthere is love after all!!

    Well one thing is for sure LOVE iS CONFUSING!!
    phoenix1664's Avatar
    phoenix1664 Posts: 226, Reputation: 19
    Full Member

    May 16, 2007, 01:29 AM
    There is such a thing as love it just cannot be explainied, you had a very nice and memorable first kiss I would not forget it if I were you, you had a bad experience but don't let that close your heart to the feeling and notion of love, yes it will be hard but you must move on she is betrothed and you feel but you will fall in love again this time with someone who will love you back for who you are, in answer to your question love does exist and it is a rare and special thing to find.
    shatteredsoul's Avatar
    shatteredsoul Posts: 423, Reputation: 130
    Full Member

    May 16, 2007, 08:17 PM
    Well, I can say that you have had a most incredible, earth shattering, wonderful, experience. It sucks that it had to end like it did. Talk about cruel. I know how you feel, but in a different way. I think you should look at this experience as a life changing event. It opened your heart and exposed you, and you went with it. You would rather have one minute of something so extraordinary, than a lifetime of nothing. What a special gift. There is no way to feel better about it ending. Life has a funny way of smacking you in the face. It will be painful for a long time, because it was such a critical moment for you. It doesn't mean it won't happen again, it will. You don't want it to happen right now because you still care about her. That's o.k. Don't deny the feelings, you will only feel worse. Allow yourself the time to feel sad about what happened. Ignoring her must be killing you. Maybe just smile at her sometime. You might feel better. She didn't mean to hurt you. She probably really felt connected and liked you, but she is a loyal person to who she is already with. That has to count for something! She let herself get close to you, and then she began to feel guilty. Well, at least you had a moment to remember. I can tell you that you would regret it more if you didn't. That kiss is something no one can take away. I say you try to just be yourself around her. It may be painful, but maybe she feels really bad too. Forgiveness will make your heart ache less. Maybe she won't get married, maybe she will, but you won't ever forget her. That is o.k. This isn't the last time you will experience love, this was just your first so it is monumental. I think it's beautiful and I am glad you shared it. Let your guard down a little, you are keeping everyone at such a distance. The heart needs to be opened up, even when it hurts. IT hurts more to try and shut your emotions off. Be courageous, and let people see that heart of yours!
    Zell's Avatar
    Zell Posts: 57, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member

    Sep 27, 2007, 01:20 PM
    Yea it exsists, but is it worth getting into?? Love is great until it goes wrong, which is when your world collapses. Then you have to spend ages rebuilding while the person you was in love with (in most cases) gets on with there life a forgets you.
    MissingHim2Much's Avatar
    MissingHim2Much Posts: 252, Reputation: 37
    Full Member

    Sep 27, 2007, 02:36 PM
    Love definitely exsists, and I believe if it's true love it may very well last forever. I experienced a true unconditional love with my ex, he on the other hand didn't share the lasting forever part of our love. But my point is I know it exsists because even after all he has done to me in the last 2 months I still love him with all of my heart. The scary part is I also think at this point that the unconditional part still exsists too and I feel I might forgive him anything.
    xkristax's Avatar
    xkristax Posts: 1, Reputation: 0
    New Member

    Oct 7, 2007, 07:05 PM
    No, love is non-existent. Humans are condemned to suffer on Earth. The world is not worthy of love, therefore we are not. Love is just our thyroids producing hormones. Our hormones try to convince us that we really do love. We choose to let this theory that love exists because we have read faerie-tales and we have heard our entire lives and we wish to have the same relationship with our lover.
    shatteredsoul's Avatar
    shatteredsoul Posts: 423, Reputation: 130
    Full Member

    Oct 9, 2007, 07:27 AM
    Oh please... that is ridiculous. Love may not be existent in your life, and many people may suffer but to say the WORLD is not worthy of love. Where do you get that? How is the world not worthy? Hormones don't convince us of anything, they just remind us how we really do feel. Fairy tales aren't real, that is why they are tales and the only love you are referring to is between two lovers. You are saying babies are not worthy of love? Try telling a mother that about her newborn, or a mama bear caring for her cubs, that isn't love? It is what every person needs and desires, if it wasn't existent, than why would be here? Why are we condemned to suffer? Yes, we create the misery and all the greed and negativity in the world, So if we suffer, it is because that is what we have reaped... that doesn't mean every living creature isn't worthy of love.
    Love is something you must feel about yourself, before you can really love anyone else. It isn't about your boyfriend or your girlfriend, it is about loving yourself.. then loving the rest of the world. If you don't feel worthy of being loved by you, if makes it difficult for anyone else to love you, whether parents, friends, children, or lover...
    Helpful (2)
    wishiknew's Avatar
    wishiknew Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Mar 4, 2008, 10:48 PM
    I don't know anymore myself. I'm 39 years old and the first time I thought I had strong feelings for someone was just 2 years ago. Pathetic... I know. Most of my life I've been socially awkward but this one girl made me realize that I had to step out of my shell if I wanted any chance at potential true happiness. I tried hard to come out of my shyness, but in the end, she wasn't interested. I'm a lot better now in social situations, but it never goes away completely... especially around someone I'm attracted to. I truly believe she was turned off by my social ineptness. I have moved on for the most part, and the more I thought about it, what I was feeling was probably just lust. It sure felt like love, but I realize now it couldn't of been... cause if it was, it would have been a two way street. Like yourself, right now, I'm trying to figure out whether true love does exist. It's getting hard to believe that it does. Even though they say love can come at any time, at my age, it's getting more and more difficult to believe that it will ever happen. You want to stop believing to ease the pain, but by doing that, you cause more heartaches for yourself because you're giving in to loneliness. So you continue to hope...
    shago's Avatar
    shago Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Aug 9, 2008, 07:39 PM
    Love is a lie
    fpfhb's Avatar
    fpfhb Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Aug 10, 2008, 07:27 AM
    Some says that love is not feelings, love is devotion. Some says that exist if you believe, not if you do not.

    In my opinion, love not exits, you will understand it all over time.
    hhmmmm's Avatar
    hhmmmm Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Aug 15, 2008, 04:42 PM
    I fell in Love, or whatever it is as we are debating its existence, when I was 16. It was love on first sight. I had that same feeling you described by just seeing the girl. Well, it never worked out and I was miserable all the time. Of course I have spent months, years, thinking about it. And right now I am really confused whether love exists or not. My main concern is that love, the way I felt it, could just be some kind of dependency. If you don't need anybody else, if you stand on your own feet, know what you want and are self-sufficient.. why would you fall in love? You might really enjoy a person and like her and when it doesn't work out anymore you just let it go and live your life like you were. I now doubt that love should be this deep craving for a person. I am really confused. This experience has made me a very insecure, lost person in this big world. But I always had this hope and vision of something bigger, greater, more meaningful than the average, everyday life, where people don't really care about each other and.. Well, the question remains open. Is this hope just my need for somebody to be my mommy or will I find "the one"? Would I have this hope, vision, idea of love if I was self-confident, socially strong, if I knew what I wanted and so on??

    Comments please
    Janmarie's Avatar
    Janmarie Posts: 167, Reputation: 46
    Junior Member

    Aug 15, 2008, 08:29 PM
    The whole story that led up to the "big kiss" was very moving almost like the mushy part of a romance novel. But it wasn't a happily ever after ending. That must have been a big blow to the ego mind to find out she is engaged. But think about it in this aspect. People in a long distance relationships get lonely sometimes for the attention of the opposite sex. She didn't do anything wrong pursay but she ended it before it went any further and caused an even bigger mess and hurt feelings.

    Think about it...if she didn't stop it then and there you would still be here on this website only asking a different kind of question like, " Why doesn't she like me anymore," or " girlfirends bf wants to kick my arse!"

    You'll never forget that first kiss and even though it was extremely intense and you saw'll feel even more of that when the real one comes into your life.
    Janmarie's Avatar
    Janmarie Posts: 167, Reputation: 46
    Junior Member

    Aug 15, 2008, 08:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xkristax
    No, love is non-existent. Humans are condemned to suffer on Earth. The world is not worthy of love, therefore we are not. Love is just our thyroids producing hormones. Our hormones try to convince us that we really do love. We choose to let this theory that love exists because we have read faerie-tales and we have heard our entire lives and we wish to have the same relationship with our lover.
    You have condemned yourself to suffer and made yourself unworthy of love. I can see that can you? Not that I am going to try and convince you otherwise unless you are willing to listen but it is those exact negative thoughts keeping you in a state of non existant love. No wonder people are so confused.

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