Hi

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 3 months now and I know all about his past, he told me right at the beginning so I knew what I was getting into. He previsously suffered with depression last year to the point where he tried to take his life. He's a lot better now, but its something that never really goes away. He does have times, about 3-4 days I won't hear from him or can't get a hold of him. That's when he's feeling low, but I worry and him not telling me just drives my mind into overload. Him being low makes me feel low as he shuts me out. I never realise what's going on until after the situation pasted.

We have talked about it before and I said just to let me know and I'll give him his space, but nothing changed. Guess its hard to change the way you cope with things, I understand that.

Just recently its happened again, but its been amost 2 weeks since I've seen him. Last time I heard from him was 4 days ago. "It was just a text how was your day?" I try to give him his space, but I'm so unpatient. I leave it about 2-3 days if I can mange that long and just tet him how are you today, what you get up 2? Or try and call him (only once) don't want to over do it. Sometimes I get a response but there few and far in between.

He doesn't give me any indication he doesn't want to be with but I worry and start turning it 2 something about me, like he's going off me. I'm so paranoid as with my ex he all of a sudden broke up with me and I didn't see it coming. I know I shouldn't bring it into the situation, but my mind gets carried away.

I just hate being shut out and not sure if I can cope with it because it brings me down and even people are starting to notice at work. I don't want to give up on him though but comments from my friends is you shouldn't be waitng around for him. I'm confused.

Any advice or previous experience on how to cope?

Sorry it's a bit long, I went on a lot

Give him time and space; hang out with your girl friends more. Find a new hobby; why not try dancing lessons?

You seem to know what the situation is and, as Flip WIlson used to say, "What you see is what you get." You've got to decide if this is satisfactory to you or not. If not then you need to rethink this relationship and consider ending things.