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    ArchanicDemise's Avatar
    ArchanicDemise Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 10, 2005, 11:37 PM
    Complicated triangle
    We shall call girl A and girl B.

    I currently possess strong feelings toward girl A, and I am good friends with girl B. The complication is that girl A and girl B are dating each other. Now this 2 have been at each others throats for a long time, there have been countless times that they broke up and got back together. Girl B gets angry easily and girl A used to cry but now she stands her ground as well and every time they fight they break up. They are currently looking in on living together, which in that case the fighting will never end. Now I expressed my feelings towards girl A, and she shares similar feelings for me, she also informed me that she wants to but she can't just let go to girl B. She is still in love with girl B.
    Now I am also going to be living with them, and I can restrain my feelings for girl A, but there will be times where she will give me that look, I have been told that when she is not with girl B and she is with me, girl B does not come to mind.
    It is only a matter of time until they fight, they break up, girl B leaves, and girl A and I share an intimate moment, I say this only because it happened before.
    So any suggestions?
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
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    #2

    Jun 14, 2005, 01:00 PM
    Are you a woman as well?

    I'd wait it out.

    Have you asked them woman out? If she does not get along with the other gal - then they will break.
    ArchanicDemise's Avatar
    ArchanicDemise Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jun 14, 2005, 06:13 PM
    Triangle
    I am not female
    Girl A is put through so much hell through the cause of girl B. (excuse my language)
    Girl A just can't get past girl B.
    Girl A is pretty much on a leash, and it is destroying the person she is.
    I was waiting it out, but day by day things get worse between them and as a result she just gets more angry and more depressed. There must be something I can say or do to make this stop. Even if she does not end up with me she will be happier without girl B.
    lickemlolly's Avatar
    lickemlolly Posts: 397, Reputation: 62
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    #4

    Jun 15, 2005, 07:33 AM
    Keyword... patience is a virtue... but be weary there is a reason she is still with girl b and even if they do break up and you two hook up there is no saying that you will get very attatched and may even start to love this girl and she turns around and goes back to girl b... so id be careful if they do about wearing your heart on your sleeve it could b your downfall
    turtlegirl's Avatar
    turtlegirl Posts: 151, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 15, 2005, 10:13 AM
    Back away...
    Yeah, as eager as you are to save the day for girl A, as attracted as you may be, whatever it is, this girl has some serious healing to do. She's STILL in a relationship with that other one. Do you HAVE to live with them? It sounds like a nightmare. That could actually keep them together longer if you're a buffer for the situation. As much as possible stay away. She knows how you feel and when she gets her act together she will (hopefully) let you know how she wants to proceed. Leave it alone; easier said than done, I know. Good luck!
    ArchanicDemise's Avatar
    ArchanicDemise Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Jun 16, 2005, 12:39 PM
    Triangle
    I don't have to live with them, in fact already been arranged to where I am not going to live with them. Yeah I have been the buffer for a long time, it did not bother me either, until I started falling for girl A,
    But you 2 are right be patient, stay away as much as I can, I thought about what could happen if girl A went back to girl B, after me and girl A hook up,
    Well "if we hook up"

    Wildcat, me and girl A already know we both have feelings for each other, its just that my feelings for her are stronger then hers for me. I have expressed how I feel to her, things were a little shakey in that area for 2 long weeks. Actually at one point some undisclosed activities between me and her took place.
    Well this is going to be very interesting couple of weeks.
    Thanks for the tips/advice, the wish of good luck (I'll need it) you all have been very helpful
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
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    #7

    Jun 16, 2005, 01:06 PM
    We'll - don't be a needy Wuss Boy over this or you WILL chase her away.

    "my feelings for her are stronger then hers for me" - early on in a relationship this is not good. You should pull back for now. I have a friend who dates A LOT of woman - he tries to keep his interest level always below hers - if it rises above hers then he backs off - doesn't call for several weeks - doesn't return calls. You want to create a challenge - and act indifferent - like it's OK if you don't see her - it Won't effect your life at all. Treat them mean - keep en kean.

    IF you act too anxious to make a relationship work, even if the other person initially seemed to be the one who wanted it, they will become turned off and start looking for the exits. Next time you decide you really want somebody, play your cards close to your chest. Don’t let on how excited you’ve become. Slowly over many months of time you can eventually show more commitment on your part, but do so incrementally, remaining alert to equal signs of commitment back. If at any point your devotion is more than an equal share, back off and give the other person a chance to catch up before proceeding further.

    It is their perception, rightly or wrongly, that someone nice must be desperately needy. The neediness or dependent characteristics exhibited by a person are actually what is repulsive.

    Understand?? I see this OVER AND OVER HERE!!
    ArchanicDemise's Avatar
    ArchanicDemise Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Jun 17, 2005, 08:33 PM
    Triangle
    Well I have Known her for several years and over the past year is when my feelings started to develop.
    Relationships are all about games, and I am attempting to avoid those games, but apparently that is an impossibilty, so if I must, I must

    Once again I thank you for the advice
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,928, Reputation: 674
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    #9

    Jun 18, 2005, 08:17 AM
    Girl A and B
    Hi,
    You are a man, and both these girls are with each other, dating?
    Move out, man.
    Get your own place. Find new girls.
    Get real, and get away from them both.
    If one of them really loves you, they will contact you sooner or later.
    Best of luck,
    fredg
    Wildcat21's Avatar
    Wildcat21 Posts: 3,582, Reputation: 435
    Ultra Member
     
    #10

    Jun 18, 2005, 11:16 AM
    They really are not games. A lot of has to do with certain Psycological principles that create attraction. You never want to be too overly aggressive or enthusiastic in the beginning - or you drive them away.

    Woma are part of your life - not your life.
    ArchanicDemise's Avatar
    ArchanicDemise Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #11

    Jun 18, 2005, 08:42 PM
    Triangle
    Aye, there dating. I don't live with them now, and I am moving into a place but not with them. As for moving on I can't quite do that, I would only do that if she asked me to. Currently I am more myself then I ever was. So I can't possibly get more real. Thanks for the wish of luck.

    That makes sense wildcat.

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