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    SWeeTCHeeKieS's Avatar
    SWeeTCHeeKieS Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Aug 31, 2008, 03:44 PM
    Clingy? You decide!
    So I've been talking to a guy at my school since may 2007. I kept trying to hang out with him all summer but he was always working and he told me that he didn't date during the summer because he works all summer. And id text him all the time prlly like almost everyday. So now that school has started back up I figured maybe he would give me a chance.. the other night I was hanging out with some friends and the guy I liked was brought up in the conversation then my friend turned to me and said she heard something about me. Long story short it went like this.. the guy I like told everyone that he didn't want to date me because I was too clingy. So if I only hung out with him once how would he know if I was clingy? This is the first guy I have ever really liked and from what I can tell he doesn't really like me back even though he tells me he does! I'm so confused!! Please someone help! HOW CAN I NOT BE CLINGY??

    So I've been talking to a guy at my school since may 2007. I kept trying to hang out with him all summer but he was always working and he told me that he didn't date during the summer because he works all summer. And id text him all the time prlly like almost everyday. So now that school has started back up I figured maybe he would give me a chance.. the other night I was hanging out with some friends and the guy I liked was brought up in the conversation then my friend turned to me and said she heard something about me. Long story short it went like this.. the guy I like told everyone that he didn't want to date me because I was too clingy. So if I only hung out with him once how would he know if I was clingy? This is the first guy I have ever really liked and from what I can tell he doesn't really like me back even though he tells me he does! I'm so confused!! Please someone help! HOW CAN I NOT BE CLINGY??
    BetrayalBtCamp's Avatar
    BetrayalBtCamp Posts: 307, Reputation: 63
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    #2

    Aug 31, 2008, 03:54 PM
    Getting into a relationship should be a mutual sport. With him you were doing all the chasing, while he was politely trying to keep his distance.

    Don't worry, we all make mistakes in relationships & trying to get in or out of them.

    You were too clingy by constantly contacting him. Next time, don't be in such a hurry to let them know you are that interested. Give them a chance to show you how much you matter to them too & how much they are interested in contacting you. Let them show you that they want to know what you are doing, how your day is going, want to talk to you & reciprocate the interest. It's not something that can be forced on someone that's not interested in a relationship or at least one with you.

    That could change, but you can't make that happen & you especially can't be being too available when they aren't interested in the same way you are.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Aug 31, 2008, 04:07 PM
    id text him all the time prlly like almost everyday
    Too much you, not enough him.

    So now that school has started back up I figured maybe he would give me a chance..
    Because you text him everyday?? If he has shown no interest so far, he never will. Dontcha just hate hearing stuff through others, instead of first hand?? I do!
    SWeeTCHeeKieS's Avatar
    SWeeTCHeeKieS Posts: 9, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Aug 31, 2008, 04:12 PM
    Sooo.. then what do I do? Just forget about him? Keep trying? I've never had a boyfriend before but I really like him.. but obvioulsy I'm doing something wrong and I don't know how to fix it...
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #5

    Aug 31, 2008, 04:18 PM
    Coming off as desperate and needy by texting him everyday is clingy as Talaniman said.
    Especially since he doesn't know you all that well he is going to take it that way.
    You have to give it up and forget about him. Every time you pursue him now is just going to look like you are chasing him.
    All you can do is be friends with your friends and enjoy your life and maybe eventually he will see that there is something attractive about you and then maybe pursue you.
    chellychenster's Avatar
    chellychenster Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Aug 31, 2008, 04:27 PM
    Guys like hard to get girls. Its cliché but totally true, girls need to have a mystery to them. If you keep texting him everyday and bugging him to hang out, he'll feel intimidated. He needs to be the one that asks you out and texting you. But since you've created the image of being "clingy", stop talking to him and wait and sees if he misses talking to you. If he does and asks you why you stopped texting him, just say things like "oh i got too busy." or "sorry it just kinda got boring." and if he doesn't miss you, then just move on. He's obviously not the right guy for you to obsess over. In the end, if a guy talks crap about you behind your back and not to your face, then he's just not worth it
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #7

    Aug 31, 2008, 06:12 PM
    Please do not start several threads on the same topic. I have combined them

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