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    missdave040607's Avatar
    missdave040607 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Nov 14, 2011, 03:54 PM
    A break, and breaking up
    My current boyfriend of 5 years has recently said if things are not better by Christmas, he would like to take a break for a few months. He also said I do not have to move out during this time.

    I also thought taking a break, and breaking up, were the same thing. Please help
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
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    #2

    Nov 14, 2011, 04:14 PM
    Not really sure what the questions here is. However, when someone asks you for a break, you respect their wishes, grant the break, and treat it as a break up. Allow him to miss you and try to move on just in case this ends up being a break up, keep yourself busy and your head held high. Also, is there any specific reason why he is wanting to leave? What are the things he is wanting to get better?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Nov 14, 2011, 04:21 PM
    What kind of changes is he looking for? Why wait for Christmas, leave NOW, and plan a great get together with family and friends. That's what I would do with that kind of threat, or ultimatum.

    Yes they are the same thing in my book.
    missdave040607's Avatar
    missdave040607 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Nov 14, 2011, 04:23 PM
    Its just weird because he said he still wants us to go out and do everything we do now so I'm confused.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #5

    Nov 14, 2011, 04:27 PM
    Why wait until Christmas? What about couples counseling? If you've been together five years, why throw the baby out with the bathwater? Do something about it immediately -- since that's what mature couples do.

    By the way, do you know what he's talking about?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #6

    Nov 14, 2011, 04:55 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by missdave040607 View Post
    Its just weird bc he said he still wants us to go out and do everything we do now so im confused.
    That's pretty convenient isn't it?? For HIM.
    vanheart's Avatar
    vanheart Posts: 2,806, Reputation: 708
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    #7

    Nov 14, 2011, 08:01 PM
    Sounds like you don't talk. Maybe never have.

    "I also thought taking a break"
    YES! Now your talking.

    "he still wants us to go out"

    Ive heard that one. Don't do that.
    Use your gut.

    Sometimes its too late. Is it?
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