I want to say your problem, helped me with mine. My boyfriend just lost his mother, too. I have a Master's in Psychology and almost a PhD in Psychology, but I was at a loss what to do, because he is rejecting me now. I am a 57 year old woman and want to be with him a great deal, because I just went through a divorce and want someone.

Anyway, to answer your problem, I think your boyfriend needs time. I think what the other answers said, he is probably afriad to lose you, too. I think that is my boyfriend's problem, too and your problem helped mine. I have a kidney problem, and maybe he feels I will die, too. Who knows what people think if they do not open up. And people will only go to counseling if they want to. I suggested to my boyfriend to go to grief counseling and he was angry with me for suggesting. I have had many losses in my life, but I guess I am a very strong person, and always bounce back, even if I lost my 1st husband, both my parents, my dog, and my 2nd marriage all in a matter of 10 years. I do remember being confused and depressed and had to go to therapy. Not everyone is open to therapy as I, and that is what you have to think with your boyfriend. Therapy is wonderful and has helped me so much. However, like your boyfriend, my boyfriend has never really been in therapy in his life, and some people are not trained and open to their feelings. They are afraid of their feelings and what happens to them when they let them out, such as crying, anger, confusion and sadness.

I wish you good luck and hope for the best for you. I am going through the same thing, so thank you so much for your question and all the wondeful answers have helped me, too. The main thing is to think you cannot control what people do, like I cannot control my boyfriend, even if I want to say, "Snap out of it, and live, ha ha just a joke but it is true. We all will have losses in our life, and we have to go on and make the best of this time, because we do not know if there is a heaven so we have to live our lives without fear. I think you were very insightful to say your boyfriend should try to live his life without fear, because fear is not good for life. We have to grasp on to life and love every moment. I almost died 1 year ago, and I feel if my boyfriend who has the same problem as yours does not want to be with me, well, even at my age of 57, I am good looking and intelligent I will find someone else.

Hope this helps. Sometimes like group therapy when people have the same problems as yourself, it is good to hear what others have done if they have the same problems.

I hope you enjoy fixing up your new house, lol, that is fun so try to concentrate on that, and be happy doing other things besides dwelling on your boyfriend's problems. His problems are his problems and you need to take care of yourself and have fun, too.