My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year. I'm 21 and he just recently turned 25. He has a child, who will be two in July, who lives in a different state. I have dealt with as much baby mama drama as any other woman in my situation, and I have learned how to deal with that part of our relationship as time has gone by. But as much as we have been through, we continue to have problems in our relationship.

To speak in specifics, my boyfriend likes to drink. I don't drink because of a medicine that I am taking -- drinking anything at all makes me sick. I don't have a problem with the fact that my boyfriend drinks.. it's the way he treats me once he has been drinking.

Overall, he is a good guy. He does things that no one else has done for me before, like leaving work just to bring me something to eat, or buying me flowers for no reason. However, when he drinks too much, he turns in to a jerk! He lies about stupid things, he ignores me and he's just plain mean. We have had numerous fights about his drinking and he has promised time and time again to put an end to this behavior. Within the past two months he has really made some changes. He no longer goes out to bars, or buys beer for his house, but this all changed the other day.

He has admitted to me that he has a problem. He knows that when he gets to that certain point where he is drunk and doesn't need to drink anything else, he doesn't know how to say no to that next drink.. which is why he has tried hard to change his ways.

However, a couple of nights ago (the day after his 25th birthday) he went over to my brother's house to hang out and drink a few beers - to celebrate his birthday since my brother couldn't join in on the fun the night before. I had to work all day and couldn't come over until after I got off work, about 5 hours after my boyfriend had arrived. I had spoken with my boyfriend earlier in the day and I knew that he had been drinking. He had agreed with me to make sure he wasn't too drunk when I got there so that we could have a good time. Of course, by the time I arrived, he was already wasted. I was upset, but didn't want to talk about it with him that night-- knowing that it would only make things worse since he was too drunk to have a serious conversation like that. However, my brother and his girlfriend could tell that I was upset and kept asking me what was wrong all night.. to which I replied that I was just tired and it had been a long day. Although, my boyfriend never once asked me what was wrong. He just sat there and kept on drinking... consuming almost 3 more beers within the one hour I was there. Then he wanted to leave, and I told him he couldn't drive and I would drive him home. This started an argument because he was drunk, and wanted to drive.. but me being the sober one wouldn't let him and it pissed him off.

So I dropped him off at his apartment and returned to my house. A few minutes later I realized I had left my laptop at his place earlier that day and wanted to come by and get it. I called him and told him that I would be over to get my computer and I could tell he was still mad. When I got there, he had placed my laptop outside of his front door (I only live a block over, so he knew I would be there within a couple of minutes). Knowing he was drunk, I grabbed my computer and left. I didn't try to see if he was inside or if the door was locked. After I returned home, my roommate showed up and told me that she had seen my boyfriend walking down the street. When I tried to call him to find out what was going on, he wouldn't answer my calls. He finally called me and told me that he needed his car and he was going to walk to go get it. I kept telling him that I would take him to get his car the next day, but he wouldn't listen. I finally gave up and figured that he was just drunk and being stupid and he could deal with it on his own if he got picked up by the cops for public intoxication.

Then a few minutes later, he called me and basically broke up with me. He told me that I treated him like , and I never let him have any fun. He cussed at me (which he never does when he is sober), and kept saying "F*** you," and "F*** off." He ended up hanging up on me and I didn't communicate with him for the rest of the night.

Of course, the next day I got a phone call from him saying how sorry he was and how he was just drunk and stupid and saying things he didn't mean. This is the first time he has ever spoken to me that way, but not the first time we have broken up. Once I had gone out with some friends to grab a drink, and he was there at the bar (when he had lied to me and said he was home, but wouldn't answer my call), so drunk that he didn't understand why I was so mad - the other time we broke up was also related to his drinking.

I guess my question is... what should I do? I get so tired of dealing with the same things over and over again. He will do so well with his drinking, but it seems like every time he will eventually get trashed and ruin it. If he could get drunk and not be an , then I could deal with it, but when he gets trashed he turns into a different person. Also, whenever we fight he throws the fact that he moved 3 hours away from his family, son, and friends to be with me, in my face. He says that he is over it, but obviously he's not since he still brings it up. I feel guilty that I "took" him away from his friends, and especially his son (but he does visit him regularly). This makes it hard on me to make a decision on what I should do. Should I give him ANOTHER chance to change his ways, or do I just deal with the fact that he is an when he drinks and just not be around him when alcohol is involved, or should I just leave the relationship and let him go back to his original home to be with his family, son, and friends?

I know that the choice is mine, but I would just like to have a perspective different from my own, or my friends'. Thank you for your advice, but if you didn't leave any, thanks just for reading.