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    shirin272's Avatar
    shirin272 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Jan 31, 2008, 04:30 AM
    Boyfriend leaving for 2 years
    My boyfriend is leaving the country for 2 years or more than that and is asking me to forget him because he does not know whether he will be back or not.
    He says he does not want to ruin my life by asking me to wait for him because he thinks that its difficult for him to come back.
    and he is also asking me not to cry for him or miss him...and start a new life...!!
    I really Love him ... how can he ask me to do that...!!
    what should i do...?
    :confused: :(
    thegirlishurting's Avatar
    thegirlishurting Posts: 38, Reputation: 5
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    #2

    Jan 31, 2008, 04:52 AM
    Its strange how your boyfriend never considered LDR. How young are you?

    Well, its normal for couples to split up before moving to another state/country. Some people find it hard to keep their hopes up when they know its going to be a tough promise. But then love and determination to continue a relationship makes LDR successful.

    It seems that you two never really talked about the future. Do this while you still have the time but make sure you're both cool and emotionally prepared.
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #3

    Jan 31, 2008, 06:06 AM
    He seems to have given up hope. And he doesn't want a long distance relationship

    You'll have to be strong and do it.

    Because even if you try to make it work. It does not seem like he will try.
    I think he is taking the easy way out personaly


    Regards
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Jan 31, 2008, 07:21 AM
    Sounds to me like his mind is made up, and there is no other choice, but to respect his wish to break up.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #5

    Jan 31, 2008, 07:33 AM
    Why would he not ask you to come with him,

    Why could he not come back

    Sounds like he is wanting to just start over and is telling you so long.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
    		  
    #6

    Jan 31, 2008, 08:12 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by shirin272
    My boyfriend is leaving the country for 2 years or more than that and is asking me to forget him because he does not know whether he will be back or not.
    He says he does not want to ruin my life by asking me to wait for him because he thinks that its difficult for him to come back.
    and he is also asking me not to cry for him or miss him...and start a new life...!!
    I really Love him ... how can he ask me to do that...!!
    what should i do...?
    :confused: :(
    He can ask you to do that because that is what he is doing. You should do what he has asked you to do.
    Start a new life
    ISneezeFunny's Avatar
    ISneezeFunny Posts: 4,175, Reputation: 821
    Ultra Member
    		  
    #7

    Jan 31, 2008, 08:29 AM
    thegirlishurting: perhaps it's because he believes LDR doesn't work. I don't believe in it.

    2 years is a long time. It seems like he's thought about ldr, didn't think it would work... so he chose this. It may/may not mean that he doesn't have feelings for you... it's just that he feels that the logistics of the relationship wouldn't work.
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
    Software Expert
    		  
    #8

    Jan 31, 2008, 12:41 PM
    This has notihng to do with where he's going. That's a convenient excuse for him. He wants to break and has done so.

    If you get real mad at him, you might accidentally lay the foundation for him worming back into your life years down the road. Hate/Anger/Love all live together in your mind in the same area.

    Consider just calmly accepting the reality and keep fond memories of your time together. Move on happily and have a great life. Don't look for ways to make this bad, don't hate him, don't make lists of things he did you'll NEVER accept from the next guy, don't punish your future dates for his mistakes. Just move on and have a good life.

    Wish him well. Mean it. Go be awesome somewhere else.
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