My boyfriend & I have been together for nearly three years. I'm only 21 years old and he's 22. We have an amazingly beautiful relationship and he treats me SO, SO well. He's very understanding, supportive, helpful, strong, funny, and any other kind of positive expressions you can possibly think of. He's an AMAZING person with a great heart. He thinks that I'm "the one" for him and I feel the same way as well. I definitely see myself marrying him. He's completely devoted to me and I see myself loving him for many, many years to come. If he can, he'd marry me now. I love him so very much but I've been feeling a bit different lately...
Okay, here's the point. Just last week, I went to a bar with my girlfriends. As we were hanging out while enjoying ourselves, these group of guys began talking to us. They were all very handsome, charming, and successful. One of the guys was clearly hitting on me but I tried really hard to ignore his comments and turned away to my friends when he had complimented me each time. As the night progressed, we had more a lot to talk about and great laughs. I was attracted to that "guy" but I tried really hard to push my feelings away because I have a boyfriend. Anyway, after the end of the night, they all invited us to hang out afterwards. As much as I wanted to say yes, I was afraid that something might've happened if I had went so I said no. Before we separated, I was hoping he'd ask for ONE of our numbers just so we can keep in touch, however, he didn't. When we walked away, all I felt was a feeling of disappointment... I guess I really wanted to spend some more time with him and his friends but that wasn't possible anymore. Anyway, the next morning that I woke up, I couldn't stop thinking about "him." I regretted not hanging out or simply asking if he wanted my number. It's been a week and I can't stop think about "him" and what could've happened if I hadn't say no. I've returned to the same bar in hopes that he might be there and I've tried searching for him online but I can't find him... I don't know why I'm feeling this way... I truly love my boyfriend and I don't want to hurt him but I can't fight that I'm really interested in that guy I met at the bar. I feel like I'm fighting with myself. I know that it's wrong for me to feel this way but I feel like I made a big mistake for not rejecting his invitation. I can't stop thinking about him. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND and I don't want to hurt him but I also can't stop thinking about that "other" guy. Then again, I don't want to lose my boyfriend... Now, if I could go back in time, I would've said "yes" and see what couldve happened. For the next few weeks or months, I might even secretly spend my time trying to find him. Sigh, please help me out...

Has your current relationship become a bit stale, repetitive and tedious? It sounds like what you enjoyed was the feeling of meeting someone for the first time.

You need to sit with yourself and have a proper think. You were describing your boyfriend as "the one". If this is genuinely true, then you need to forget this other guy. A bit of flirting is okay when in a strong relationship, but your title was "might end up cheating". If you think you're really going to cheat, I'd have the decency to break up with him first.

Have a proper think. You don't want to do anything rash, just as you were after a bit of excitement. You might lose something that was going to be there forever.

X Dani

At least you're honest.

You know that had you could turn back the clock, you would have gone with this other guy.

Don't fall into the trap of re-thinking the 'what if's'. There is just a good a chance of things going you way you wish they had now, and where would you be. Do you really think that if it came right down to it, you would have been with another man?

We have many here on AMHD who post about excuses for doing the same thing you wish you had done. And when the boyfriend is not blamed for 'causing' the fling with another man, the booze is. For example, my boyfriend neglects me, has a gas problem, and won't take out the garbage, or, because of being so drunk, 'it' just happened and I had no control over my behaviour.

Realize the night in the bar, for what it was. A night out, some laughs, friendly banter, etc. That was all that happened, and if you leave the experience alone, and not pursue finding this mystery man, you have lost nothing. Dream all you want to about this prince charming, like you would dream about Brad Pitt, but realize that it is only that- and nothing more.

We all meet people we 'click' with, and there are clear signs of attraction. Even lingering thoughts, as you are experiencing. But, to take this any further would mean you are pursuing another man, and risking what you have now. You find his phone number, you start texting, you meet up...

Let it go, and remain faithful.

All I can say about this issue is that you have to live and learn. You sound like you want to explore other relationships before settling down. At the same time, you don't want to risk losing your BF.

Don't fall for the allusion of "the grass is greener on the other side". Stay with your BF.

A bit late now... How are you carrying along? I feel the same way about my boyfriend, and I also met a guy who is good looking, funny and we have lots of common things. I don't really want believe this thing of "If you love him, you can't think of being with someone else". Men cheat all the time (generalising I know, but it happens), and then they come to their spouses as if nothing happened. Why can't we do the same? Be smart, try out a new guy, flirt, maybe one or two kisses and see how you feel. If you want more, maybe you just need to experiment. Of course there's the risk of your boyfriend finding out (as I said, be smart), but, anything in this life is stable for sure.. maybe one day he'll cheat on you or you break upanyways... I know I sound very sour, but am just trying to see all the possibilities and think you could do the same.

Im in the same situation... me and my boyfriend have been dating for about 7 months now and I've cheated on him a few times before... and he's found out all of those times. He has forgave me but not forgotten. Its been a struggle to move past it but I've learned to fall in love with him and he's in love with me... although I'm not sure what "in love" means to me at this point. He is the most amazing guy and very sweet at times... we argue all the time about little and big stuff almost every day!. but without him I feel like nothing. He has always been loyal and trust worthy... but I haven't. Now I've been talking to this guy and cheating for almost a week.. and I feel terrible... and not sure what to do.. Can someone please help..