Ok, I hung out with my friend tonight, it was her birthday and I really saw how over bearing an intimidating she can be. The thing I am thinking is, does she in some way control what the gilr I am interseted in thinks (her best friend). I don't know what it is with me, but I think I get a pretty good idea about people now and the way they work. I NEVER look to kiss arse on ANYONE, but for some reason I see the need for me to gain acceptance from this girl in order to get closer and have a relationsip with her friend that is moving back next month. I don't know if I am over analizing this situation, but it really hit me tonight for some reason because I saw her controlling side tonight. I mean, I thike her (as a friend) but she is just an intimidating woman in general. I don't feel intimidated by her, but I can see how most do. I am at the point in my life where I just want a woman that thinks for herself and don't want someone that needs her friends to like me so she does. Am I looking too much into this? I just think women see more importance in their friends liking their boyfriend than guys do. I couldn't care less what my friends think of my girlfriend, but most of the time they are right I guess... Bah! Thoughts... I would REALLY like some opinions on this one...









p.s. Im a psych amjor, so I think it makes me think too much sometimes.

Hi,
The girl you are interested in is her best friend?
You have a "downhill" fight on your hands!
She already has a friendship (best friends) with this girl you are interested in, so she is already "closer" to this new girl than you are.
You will be fighting for this new girl's affection. You sure you want to get into this?
Is it possible you can meet someone who doesn't know either of these girls?
I do wish you the best, and good luck.

Jeff you have raised a very valid question, Does your g/f's best friend have too much influence over her? Glad your going into this cautiously and with eyes wide open. No you don't have to kiss her best friends arse and your question will be answered as you get into this relationship more.Good luck And be patient and cautious.:cool: ;)

I think it's true that women tend to be more swayed by the opinions of others than men. However I think you summed it up well when you said that you need a woman who can think for herself. Hopefully this girl you're interested in can and won't be swayed by this overbearing friend of hers. Either way I wouldn't worry about getting this person's approval. Usually people who are overbearing tend to be very negative and don't ever see any good in anything so trying to win her approval is probably a losing battle anyway. Just work on the girl you're interested in without worrying about this other person.

Yes they do have HUGE influence... yes, you DO have to kind of kiss their behind - at least initially. Several times I have had women's best friends pretty much sabatoge relationships as they are very jealous and think you are stealing their time.

Damn it... :cool:

It's part of the pitfalls, twist and turns, unwritten rules of a relationship.

Her friend most often times than not ready to BAD MOUTH YOU at any chance IF you do something dumb.

That's why I think it's best not to meet her friends too early - get to know her.

Also, why I think it's best not to date a friend of a friend in most cases.