Hi All,

I would like some advice about my current situation. My girlfriend and I split up a few days ago.

She said she has not been happy for a long time because I have neglected myself and my friends and have began to smother her. We have not been getting along for the last couple of months.

To be honest, she has set up a mortgage in her own name and said I could move in and pay her rent for a year. If we are still getting along, then I would go onto the mortgage. We have also struggles sexually, since I have been having a few problems in that department.

I said I was willing to go to a therapist in order to work on our problems, but she refused, so I have moved out of our rented apartment and back to my parents' home. However, I have to meet her on the weekend to pick up the rest of my stuff and tie up financial loose ends.

To be fair, I don't even know if I want to get back with her. She said some very harsh things about me. And later I texted her saying I was gutted, and she said the same, but I had to be strong. I have initiated NC, but I have to go on Sunday. How do I approach things?

I love her very much, but I'm unsure even what I want now. I'd like peoples' opinions what I should do. I think I may just go get my things, do what I have to, and leave.

That woud be the best plan of action.

I agree, gathe your things, say bye with a handshake, and leave.

Yep, get your things and then go.

Right!

Now I'm confused! I've tried not to contact my ex since the split... we split on the Sunday I was supposed to go and settle financial matters on Sunday gone but she text me on Wednesday to ask if I could go on Friday afternoon to pick up my things but we would speak on Sunday so I agreed and to be fair it was for the best as I got quite emotional about the whole situation.

Anyway come Saturday she contacted me to say I had left my TV and she couldn't make our meeting as she was busy on Sunday and that we would talk on the phone on Sunday... I was furious! Rather than calling her straight away I composed myself over the following hour or so then called her, I was calm and indifferent about that split I just kept it purely business! I was happy with the arrangement and considered my work done other than getting her to remove my name from our lease.

Anyway my cousin bumped into me whilst I was out on Saturday having a drink and good time with my friends we are very close and my ex has now started to hang around with his girlfriend... he explained that he never liked her and was going to make her leave our circle of friends for what she has done to me, I tried to convince him against it but he wouldn't listen. Apparently my friends all turned up at the club, my cousin included and she quickly left to go to another club.

I thought nothing of it and carried on, nothing seems to be bothering me about her actions no highs and lows just normal... so I updated my Facebook status to single and left it at that it was the first time id been on since the split and a few people asked me what happened, I just replied its one of those things these things happen in life... I went to see my friends in the pub and they said she changed her status to what a weekend!

Today I was just sitting at my desk at work and she text me saying could you have a word with your cousin saying he's going to pour a drink over me in the club, were all adults... you don't have to but id appreciate if you would. I just replied saying I was going out with him at the weekend and I would then, she text me back some reply about he's nasty etc and I haven't replied

Just seems like she's trying to get in touch for things she doesn't need to every couple of day, I'm confused where she's coming from as I'm not sure what she wants... I made it clear I would not remain friends with her after the split!


Any ideas/advice what she's doing?



P.S she does not know I was emotional moving my things I was but I didn't contact her in anyway to suggest so

It does not matter just ignore her. Stop talking about her to people, leave it all alone.

She is getting you to do the dirty work of dealing with your friends. You better start ignoring her texts, and not responding to her at all.