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    ka1's Avatar
    ka1 Posts: 110, Reputation: 10
    Junior Member
    		  
    #1

    Dec 24, 2009, 11:04 PM
    1st Christmas
    Hi, guys. I've been in my hole. Sometimes dealing, sometimes trying to get her back. Today is the first time I'm alone on Christmas in 7yrs. I'm a mess. And its not just her, or the thoughts of her buying sweet cards and gift for someone else. Its her and her family. The holidays I always take them to the movies. I get them gifts, and play with them. Whenever they see me they run and just hung me. I would just love to take them to Avatar. Last year me and my ex helped her nephew ride his first bike. When he was done, she kissed me, told me she loved me, and that I was going to make an excellent father. 23 days later she's gone and near as I can tell has not looked back. You've heard before.

    I miss it all, and I don't know what to do with myself. My whole life feels like its gone right now. The pain I feel in my gut feels like I'm going to just break in half
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #2

    Dec 24, 2009, 11:11 PM

    No, it's not about her and her family. It's about you and your need to share your love and warmth with someone.

    There's no other family you can foster/"adopt" and help enjoy the holidays? Call your local Catholic Charities or Lutheran Family Social Services or township office or county human resources department. It's not too late to bring smiles to faces.
    ka1's Avatar
    ka1 Posts: 110, Reputation: 10
    Junior Member
    		  
    #3

    Dec 24, 2009, 11:27 PM
    I'm sure it is. But I'm being selfish tonight. I want her, and I want be around the family. Helping would be good, and take my off it for a little, while, but I want to see my little buddies. Jesus, I should never have fallen in love her.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #4

    Dec 24, 2009, 11:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ka1 View Post
    I'm sure it is. But I'm being selfish tonight. I want her, and I want be around the family. Helping would be good, and take my off it for a little, while, but I want to see my little buddies. Jesus, I should never have fallen in love her.
    Gee, why don't you just pick up a hammer and pound your head? That's what you are doing to yourself emotionally. Stop it with the selfishness because you won't get her back that way or maybe any way. If you really love her, let her go. Meanwhile, so many kids have gone to bed tonight knowing that Santa won't stop at their house. What are you going to do about that?
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
    		  
    #5

    Dec 26, 2009, 03:55 AM
    Sometimes it is the whole package isn't it. You aren't just letting go of the one you loved, but their family too.

    This will be the worst Christmas, by far, to get through. But you will, and next year is just around the corner, with new opportunities.

    Now that it is over, try to just get through the coming days keeping busy. There is nothing you can do to change the past and you can't go back in time. Just try to be happy, and let the past stay in the past.

    Life is too short to lament about lost loves.
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