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    justme005's Avatar
    justme005 Posts: 200, Reputation: 7
    Full Member
     
    #1

    Nov 4, 2013, 07:07 PM
    10 years older
    What are the thoughts about dating a guy 10 years older? I am 26... he is 36... about to me 37 actually. Never that much physical attraction, but I always thought the age was an issue, so I never pursued us. But he is the first guy that ever said he loved me. And he has been so good to me. I've kind of dicked him around because I wanted to date and see how that goes. Needless to say, I haven't found anyone dating yet... after a year and a half. He is from Japan. We have never been intimate, but have gone out together a lot and have been on dates, even though I never considered them dates until now.. looking back on them. I have known him for about 4 years and we have been great friends.
    There is just something holding me back. He is very upfront and wants to be in a relationship and would probably love to marry me (from the way he acts).

    Why can't I get over this age thing? It's is bothering me so much. What do I do? Is it not meant to be something intimate? Should I keep dating and wait? If I keep waiting and never find someone... I feel like he will just keep getting older and we will be wasting time. If we haven't wasted enough! I just can't get past the age. I know a lot of people say, who cares! But I don't know! I just feel like I am getting older and my friends are getting married and I am still alone. I need to move on it. Maybe I am being blind.
    Someone help!
    pioji's Avatar
    pioji Posts: 57, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Nov 5, 2013, 03:31 PM
    How do you really feel about him? Or maybe you just want to date him because your friends are settling down? You have yo really figure out how you feel and what would you like this to take you. Maybe you are not ready for a settlement, have you thought of that? Age is just a number, if there is love its totally fine. I once dated 7 years older then me and it was fine, yes people looked at us weird (because I was younger and you could really tell the age diff) but we were happy and we didn't care. Try to figure it, don't worry about what other people say, don't even considered the way he feels about you, you have to know what you want and how you feel! Best of luck!
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
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    #3

    Nov 5, 2013, 04:50 PM
    The age is never going to go away, and is clear that it is an issue, so I would suggest against it. It also sounds as if you are desperate for a relationship and therefore are considering possibilities that weren't possible in your mind before. Why are you feeling such a rush to jump into a relationship. Just relax, and date, till you find a person who you are both physically and mentally attracted to. Remember that relationships will have issues, if you are going to jump into one at least jump into one where issues don't already exist.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,244, Reputation: 10853
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    #4

    Nov 5, 2013, 04:58 PM
    All your other posts are about dating older men, and a few pregnancies. Why is this guy so different than the others?

    Why do you have to be in such a hurry to get a boyfriend or husband? Stop looking for love and marriage and just date for fun and the opportunity to know someone. And get some birth control.

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