I am 29 years old and was dating a guy for a little while. We lived together for about 6 months. I left to go on a trip for work and when I came back he broke up with me. He said he broke up with me because he wanted to work on himself. A few days later he started dating another women (we are still living in the same apartment at this point). Then I find out that I am pregnant and he breaks up with her.

He wanted me to get an abortion but that's not what I want. Also, I don't want to be a single mother and I want my child to have a chance to have two full time parents not just two part-time parents. I have been rather mean and non trusting of him but I do believe for good reasons.

Since the pregnancy, I have moved out of the apartment but he left me no choice. We have argued constantly and have said many hurtful things. He then started dating another new girl. We rarely talk about anything in regards to the baby. Most days I am so caught up on being pregnant and single that I can't think past that. I know I should be thinking about how I want raise this child but I never make it that far. I started attending therapy because I know I should not want to be with him but I still do.

A little more background: My father was never really in my life. My mother had custody and my father had visitation rights that he rarely executed. I don't want that for my child. All I wanted in my life was for my father to be there but he never paid attention to my pleads.

Anyway, does anyone have any suggestion on how I can win him back? It's not that he's a bad guy, he's just dealing with this badly.

Unfortunately, there is no way to "win someone back" when they don't want to be won. You can't change his mind; he has to make up his own mind.

That being said, you need to focus on you and your baby. It's sad that you're in a situation that is making you confront your own "demons", but this baby isn't a repeat of your childhood. He/she is a brand new chance to make it right.

There is no magic formula to win someone back - I would be doing you a disservice if I told you that you should do this or that to win him back.

You want a man who is there for you and your child, not a man who is confused about what he wants, not interested in you, and breaking up with girls all over the place.

So, maybe this didn't answer your question - but maybe it will help you realize that he's not what you should be focusing on right now.

This baby - this adorable little present just for you - is depending on you to be 100% there for him/her. She/he can be your world... focus on that... not some misguided man.

I wish you the best of luck!

I agree, don't try to win him back. Sometimes it takes awhile for the initial shock to wear off. Maybe in time he will come to realize that he wants to be with you and help raise this child... maybe he won't.

Plan on how you are going to do this on your own, because odds are that is what will happen. It is understandable that you are holding onto the idea of his stepping up and being a father to your child given your past experience, but as HistorianChick said, you can't make him want the same thing. You may very well be better off without the stress of wondering what he is going to do, whether he is going to be there for you and the baby.

Focus on you and your baby... in time, you will quite likely meet someone who actually wants to be with you and be a father... not someone who feels obligated to play that role.