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    fokaloka's Avatar
    fokaloka Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Feb 28, 2005, 11:46 AM
    Everybody upset at me...
    I tried to live by my own but I couldn't wasn't ready for. Now I am. Anyway. I lived for three month by myself. The people there were my friends. So I bonded more with them and I enjoyed freedom... so now sometimes on sundays I don't go to granmas or at saturdays I skip some casual joinnings with family. I used to be very close with my family. But now I am trying to make a live for myself. Sometimes , I get bored of being with people over my age or under. I am the only woman with 20īs among them. They are pre-teens or over 30's.
    At march many member of my family are having birthday... By my birthday I am preparing a party with my friends. Everybody get bugged. I don't know why they get angry. I always celebrate with both..

    I
    keenu's Avatar
    keenu Posts: 114, Reputation: 9
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Mar 1, 2005, 03:12 PM
    So let them be upset
    Hey, it's your life and if they choose to be upset then that is their problem.
    You cannot live your life for anyone else but YOU. You create your own reality and you can change your reactions to others. If they get upset you don't have to choose to react to that. Don't get me wrong, family is good, but don't let them control you. Sometimes one has to distance one's self from them. Don't choose to feel bad or guilty. Choose to control your own life. Good luck.
    thetachi464's Avatar
    thetachi464 Posts: 93, Reputation: 4
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Mar 1, 2005, 09:16 PM
    Hope this helps
    What worked for me was to go away to college and not to come home but on the holidays. If you live in a big town or in the city I would tell them that you are working strange hours that way they will tend to lay off you. Also talk to them let them know how you feel. This way at least they will know how you feel. Like I said I just left town and then never came home told them work classes and my fraternity got in the way of coming home. Hope this helps and you can get things figured out good luck.
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,929, Reputation: 674
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Mar 4, 2005, 07:49 AM
    Family
    Hi,
    Habits that have been formed over many years are hard to break. By that, I mean that your family has developed the habit of seeing you at birthdays, get-togethers, etc, and it will take time to change that.
    Your Grandma, especially, needs understanding at a time like this, because she is much older. Some older persons need more understanding than others. Some Grandmas really don't have any kind of life anymore; while others are very involved in different things. If your Grandma doesn't do anything all day long, she would really appreciate meeting your friends.

    Talk with your family, without getting upset, in a friendly way, and explain, as another expert said, that you now have friends you didn't have before.

    If possible, it would really make an older lady happy to have you come by your Grandma's and take her to your birthday party with your friends, if only for a short while. Introducing her to your friends would "make her day", and show that you really, really care for her.
    As for the rest of the family, they will eventually accept the fact that you are now on your own, and have your own life to live. They can also be a part of it, naturally, but just not seeing them as much.
    Best wishes to you, and best of luck,
    fredg
    rkim291968's Avatar
    rkim291968 Posts: 261, Reputation: 34
    Full Member
     
    #5

    Sep 17, 2005, 08:22 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by fokaloka
    I tried to live by my own but i couldnt wasnt ready for. now i am. anyways. i lived for three month by myself. The people there were my friends. So i bonded more with them and i enjoyed freedom...so now sometimes on sundays i dont go to granmas or at saturdays i skip some casual joinnings with family. I used to be very close with my family. But now i am trying to make a live for myself. Sometimes , i get bored of being with people over my age or under. I am the only woman with 20īs among them. They are pre-teens or over 30's.
    At march many memeber of my family are having birthday...By my birthday i am preparing a party with my friends. Everybody get bugged. I dont know why they get angry. I always celebrate with both... ?

    I
    As you get older, you will be more willing to mix with different age groups. Feel free to enjoy your life with your age group for now. Youth only lasts once.

    - Been there

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