I have a pre-teen daughter who is very emotional. She seems to explode and get so touchy. Tonight she is so upset and crying heavily downstairs because we had a conflict. She was on the computer doing some email stuff, fisnishing up. The only reason she had been on was to email some stuff to her dad for a project. She came across some pictures she wanted and I was trying to explain that she could save them to her gmail account and she could do it later, AFTER her homework was done. But she was in a very excited mood and kept interrupting--I never could finish my sentence, so I finally snapped with, "Shut your mouth." She pushed my button and it turned into some big explosive ordeal, but with her, not me. I wasn't happy, but kept my cool. What it boiled down to was her disrespectfulness, which I reprimanded her for, but still kept my cool. There was no talking to her, she is upset, thinks that I should apologize, and we got into a discussion about interrupting, in which she interrupted me when I was explaining how her interrupting me pushed me. I covered my hand over her mouth, not a hit or slap, just a cover to show that she was doing it again. She got even more mad. What it boiled down to is that I was still trying to talk to her, told her to calm down and that there was no "fight" here. Her only response was, "I don't care, I don't care." And when she talked, she was loud and snotty, which she probably isn't even aware of because she is so worked up. This is so ridiculous, there doesn't need to be a fight, but I will stand my guard and tell her that certainly, YES, when I'm interrupted more than once and the button is pushed, I am certainly in my right to tell her to shut her mouth. She needs to understand that she is 11, and I am the parent and parents and children are NOT equals. Most of the time we have an awesome relationship. I'm so proud of her in many ways. This past year we've had some stupid instances like this so I started counseling with her in the fall. We try to work through some of this, but she does use a lot of time just talking to her counselor. She was a straight A student, up until this year, we are having huge attitudes with the teacher this year---I mean huge. The teacher doesn't like her (that's another story, and YES I've taken steps to try to fix that, too). In fact, I think part of the reason why she was so emotional tonight is because not just a half an hour before she was telling me about more instances with the teacher, and she was very worked up about that. I love my daughter so much, but sometimes I just don't know what to. She's bright, smart and very pretty, and her body is fully grown-up. But these mother/daughter issues are driving me batty. I want to comfort her and love her, but she pushes me away so rudely. I usually just give her some time to calm down and in time she is fine---but the part that bugs me is the DISRESPECT. She needs to take my word, period. She loves to argue, or explain herself through every situation (defensiveness), and she does this with others, too. It makes her come across as "snotty," or "mouthy" and I fear I did something wrong in the parenting. I'm a divorced mother with physical placement (kids see there dad regularly) and my other child is seven and has autism. It's NOT easy, to say the least. I'm just scared for my daughter and don't know what to do to make this situation better. When she breaks down and cries over these stupid things, it is obvious there is a lot of hurt inside her that has nothing to do with the situation that brought it all out. It breaks my heart. What am I supposed to do?