I married an Indonesian man in May 2002Someone please tell me something about Indonesian men and how they approach marriage. After only 7 months, I am ready to file for divorce.He came into my home and immediately started throwing things out.Things I have had for over 20 yrs.He checks on my phone messages,he checks when I am home or out running errands,even if he has to leave his job.He has checked the mileage on my car.But he can talk on the phone all hours of the day or night to men or women.He likes to argue about anything, I do not like to argue.It seems like he tries to get me upset over trivial things,I.e.when the dishwasher should be emptied,how the dishes should be put away,how to make the bed.He will not let me run the household as I see fit.Are all Indonesian men so controlling? He does not want to support the household and requires me to have a job.Am I crazy or am I being controlled?He says he is a christian.I have tried everything to try and get along with him. The words out of his mouth confessing undying love do not match his actions.His outside friends seem to come first.He consults them on any problem before talking to me about it.Is there any hope,or is it all cultural differences that cannot be overcome.

Hello and commiserations.

No, all Indonesian men are not like this. Escape while you can, you are being treated as a second class human being. I ran from a relationship like this 20 years ago and have never been happier.

Best of luck

Susanne 8

:) see my reply at answerway.com

Thanks.