Asked Feb 24, 2012, 11:34 AM
My son-in-law has a very poor work ethic. He hasn't worked in several years and when he does work, he loses jobs due to poor attitude. He thinks everything is beneath him. My DD and SIL have a couple children and they have lost their car and their home. They have had to move in with my SIL's parents in another state. I miss my grandkids, but I couldn't have them move in with us. No way we would like to see SIL sitting on the couch day after day. Apparently, he has convinced his parents that it is too hard to get a job, but even when the economy wasn't bad, he had a pattern of working and then losing jobs. I guess my daughter and SIL are angry that they had to move to another state and we didn't take them in, but as far as I am concerned, his parents are enabling them. I did everything to help them when I thought it would do some good and get them back on track, but I eventually realized that nothing would get him back to work. His parents helping them just delayed the inevitable loss of their home. If losing their home and their car didn't teach him a lesson, what will? My issue is that I don't know what to say to my daughter. She goes along with all of his excuses just like his parents do. When I do try to talk with her, it is always "I know", but she doesn't do anything about it. I am just hoping his parents get tired of his lying around the house and start believing me that he is his own worse enemy. I am upset all the time because I don't see anything changing. I don't think he is being a very good role model for his kids. So is my position just to keep quiet? If my daughter feels that there is nothing she can do, would it be counter productive to talk to her and have her get stressed out probably more than she already is?