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    Ayshaa's Avatar
    Ayshaa Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:17 AM
    Me and my boyfriend is really happy we were in love for the past 3 year but suddenly
    My boyfriend is in love with me for 03 years but we were really happy in our relation but now he is going around with other gal and he is going to get married with her.. I find really difficult to forget him. He is not talking with me... fully ingores me
    lovebird120's Avatar
    lovebird120 Posts: 110, Reputation: 11
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    #2

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:24 AM

    Did you guys have a bad breakup?
    How long ago did you guys break up?
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #3

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:27 AM

    Okay, so let's look at the facts here.
    1. He is engaged to someone else.
    2. He isn't talking to you.

    I don't think he's your boyfriend anymore, I think he's moved on. You need to do the same.
    broken_ heart's Avatar
    broken_ heart Posts: 201, Reputation: 22
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    #4

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:32 AM

    Your situation seems to be just like mine, so I will suggest you not to do any mistake of chasing him. If he ignores you, you also ignore him and you said he is in love with you. No he was not in love with you because if he was he wouldn't have left you for some other girl. Secondly, he is going to get married with that girl. The best thing I can say the earlier you accept this fact the better for you. I know saying it is much more easier than implementing it but you have to do it anyhow for your good life. He has moved on and you should also move on. Just get busy in other things you loved to do. Don't think about him.
    Ayshaa's Avatar
    Ayshaa Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:33 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by lovebird120 View Post
    did you guys have a bad breakup?
    how long ago did you guys break up?
    No last month he came and meet me then from the next day he is not attending my call and after 5 days he answered my call and told me that he is love with other gal and from that day his call is waiting almost for 6 to 7 hours
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #6

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:35 AM

    He's not in love with you. He's found someone else. And you are leaving yourself open to heartbreak. You need to move on, do not contact him. You need time to heal.
    Ayshaa's Avatar
    Ayshaa Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:37 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by broken_ heart View Post
    your situation seems to be just like mine, so i will suggest you not to do any mistake of chasing him. if he ignores you, you also ignore him and you said he is in love with you. No he was not in love with you because if he was he wouldnt have left you for some other girl. secondly, he is going to get married with that girl. the best thing i can say the earlier you accept this fact the better for you. I know saying it is much more easier than implementing it but you have to do it anyhow for your good life. He has moved on and you should also move on. Just get busy in other things you loved to do. Dont think about him.
    Your rite... Almost 2 months he was maintaining me and also her now finally ditch me...
    Ayshaa's Avatar
    Ayshaa Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:40 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ChihuahuaMomma View Post
    He's not in love with you. He's found someone else. And you are leaving yourself open to heartbreak. You need to move on, do not contact him. You need time to heal.
    Hey you are rite... but still I miss him... but he is not showing on interest... first of all he came back now... :mad:
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #9

    Jan 6, 2010, 03:42 AM

    He is hopping from her to you and back because you're letting him have his cake and eat it too. Cut ALL contact with him, it will be the best thing you've ever done.
    Ayshaa's Avatar
    Ayshaa Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Jan 6, 2010, 04:00 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ChihuahuaMomma View Post
    He is hopping from her to you and back because you're letting him have his cake and eat it too. Cut ALL contact with him, it will be the best thing you've ever done.
    Hmmmm... even I had done... if I go back he is ignores me... but if I ignore he is coming back again and again
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #11

    Jan 6, 2010, 04:11 AM

    Then tell him,once and for all,to s t a y away. You are in charge of your own life,nobody else is.
    Ayshaa's Avatar
    Ayshaa Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Jan 6, 2010, 04:23 AM

    I have toooooo... no other go... he is playing around me..
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #13

    Jan 6, 2010, 05:11 AM
    Exactly. Pull the plug on his manipulations. Heal from all this and realise that you've the strength to rebuild a happy,contented life for yourself.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
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    #14

    Jan 6, 2010, 07:43 AM

    Why do you allow anybody to treat you this way.

    I don't think it's so much him, as it is you not having the ability to say a simple 'no'.

    Why is that.

    He is engaged to be married. That alone should be enough of a reason not to contact him. He's not available.
    Ayshaa's Avatar
    Ayshaa Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #15

    Jan 7, 2010, 02:08 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Jake2008 View Post
    Why do you allow anybody to treat you this way.

    I don't think it's so much him, as it is you not having the ability to say a simple 'no'.

    Why is that.

    He is engaged to be married. That alone should be enough of a reason not to contact him. He's not available.
    Hey he was suppose to get married with me by this march... but suddenly he changed his mind with other gal... even if I say no to him again again he is coming back of me
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
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    #16

    Jan 7, 2010, 02:29 AM

    Don't answer his calls,texts etc and don't let him in your door.
    If he persists,take out a restraining order.
    ChihuahuaMomma's Avatar
    ChihuahuaMomma Posts: 7,378, Reputation: 608
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    #17

    Jan 7, 2010, 02:43 AM
    It sounds like this girl doesn't WANT to heal.. She is clinging to him when he obviously wants nothing to do with her. Have we considered that maybe he has a restraining order against HER? This is a serious issue--it's hard enough to get over someone and move on with your life, but if you can't even accept that it's over. Perhaps you need counseling, have you ever talked to a doctor about your feelings? It might be something to look into.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #18

    Jan 7, 2010, 02:58 AM

    It sounds like he's played both women, and finally made up his mind, and you lost.

    Chihuahua is right. You don't want to stop taking him back, and that is a problem. Not letting go, and instead settling for being 'the other woman' and making yourself available thinking he'll change his mind, is just unhealthy, unproductive, and keeps you stuck in a rut.

    My hope for you is that the next time he knocks at your door, you will realize that the man on the other side, is not worth your time.

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