I hate my dad.
I'm afraid of him, I don't love him and he gets me very angry, A LOT.

He had a strict upbringing and so obviously he was strict with me and my brother, whenever we did something wrong, intentional or not he'd smack our backsides and ground us, like a normal parent.
But this has made me hate him and I don't see him as my dad, to me he's just a man I call dad who pays bills and stays with us, I've got no bond with him whatsoever.

When me and my brother had pets, me a rabbit and him two guinea-pigs he was yell at me only when they didn't have enough food or water, he'd tell me I was a cruel even though the g-pigs were my brothers pets and not my responsibility at all! And I'd hate him even more and get angry and scared at the same time.
Today he told me off for spending all my money that I had in the bank, I'm a teenager I know money doesn't come easy but I worked for it, it belongs to me so I can spend it however I want until I'm old enough to have bills or to do food shopping! He read my bank statements to find out how much of my money I spent, he told me I had better start saving up and stop scrounging off him and my mam.
Save up for what? I'm 16 in a week or so what could I possibly save up for? And I only borrow £5 off my mam for the train fair when I don't have cash at hand, I pay it back to her, so he has no right to look at my bank statements (which I didn't even read!) or tell me not to spend my money! :mad:

I respect him, even though I don't love him, he stands up for people who can't defend themselves, is a strong man and rather funny, I'm like him in a lot of ways but I still don't like it.
His temper is extremely short, if you make too much noise for more than a minute he yells, if I say I don't want or like something, or if I just don't understand what's happening or hear a question he yells at me and to be honest, sometimes I could just cry, but I don't because he will yell at me again.

I still have quite a few years in this house and I'm getting to a point where I'm thinking of telling my mam I hate him, I've told my grandma and she understands completely, I'm at the end of my tether and don't know what to do.

Your attitude will change as you get older and probably find that he is the first person there for you when you get in trouble. Be patient. You will come to love him, seek him out in time of need and look up to him for guidance.

Peace

Im afraid that time has come and gone.
I once tried to talk to him about trouble I was having with a friend, he listened at first, but then started ignoring me, he hates my friends, my brothers friends and even my mams friends. I will not reach out to a man who doesn't care about my life, I do not want to idolize a man who was thrown out of the valuntary army for "bad behaviour" or who gets into fights and has spent a night in jail for stealing a car and driving it into a restaurant wall. (even though that's why I respect him, I still know its wrong)