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    greeneyedbaby's Avatar
    greeneyedbaby Posts: 60, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member

    Jul 22, 2008, 01:27 PM
    My dad thinks I'm super human and its making me sick literally
    I am a 20 year old female with 4 different jobs. I have just recently moved out of my parents house and into a place with my roommate. One of the jobs I have I am a Avon rep and I deliver the products people order. Well I have been moving all weekend and got delayed in making the deliveries. So my dad called me this morning saying that if I can't deliver them I need to quit. And he jumps on me anytime I work overtime or go in early. But then he demands that I go over to his house and be there all day doing things to help them out, then complains that I haven't even unpacked everything yet and knows that I start job on at 530 in the morning. I try to please him but doing everything that I need to do throughout the day plus the things he "needs" me to do during the day makes my day go from a 530am to 11pm day to 530 am to almost 1am. And that's not including any weekends he needs me. I am literally getting sick and am tired all the time and have resorted to caffeine pills to give me energy to stay awake all day. I know that I can handle the jobs because I have been doing them for almost a year, its just the extra stuff my dad makes me do that kills me. And its only started happening once I moved out. How can I tell him without disappointing him that I'm not superwoman and need a day off?
    love is abby's Avatar
    love is abby Posts: 114, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member

    Jul 22, 2008, 01:29 PM
    Move far, far away. Lol, I'm just kidding.

    Talk to your father he loves you and he probably doesn't realize his fault.
    smokedetector's Avatar
    smokedetector Posts: 368, Reputation: 56
    Full Member

    Jul 22, 2008, 01:57 PM
    Talk to him, and if he doesn't want to listen, start making of list of what you need to do (A list) and what he wants you to do (B list). Once you have done all of A list, you can move to B list if you have time left before you have to go to sleep (at a reasonable hour) The reason it's A & B list and not one list, your stuff first and his second is because what is on A list is more important and you have to make time at some point to do it, and what is on B list is stuff that you don't have to make time to do, but can if you find a spare moment and you feel like it. Good luck.
    love is abby's Avatar
    love is abby Posts: 114, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member

    Jul 22, 2008, 02:10 PM
    Comment on smokedetector's post
    Awesome :)
    justsaynope's Avatar
    justsaynope Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Oct 16, 2008, 11:56 AM
    First, you are 20 years old and not obligated to be at your parents' beck and call, especially if you are not living with them. Please read the book, "Boundaries", by Dr. Henry Cloud. I cannot tell you how much this book has helped my life! You, and only you, can determine when and how much help is appropriate for you to give your parents. Do not make yourself sick trying to please them. Learn to say no. You do NOT have to give any reason why you cannot come and help them on any particular date. Just say, I love you and I would love to help you out, but I just am not able to right now. When you CAN help them, without jeopardizing your sleep and health, then do so. I have 5 children of my own, ranging in age from 4 years old to 27 years old. While my children are living in my home, regardless of age, I expect them to help out around the house. But once they move out on their own, it is not their responsibility. Unless I were disabled to the point where I truly needed their help, that is. You did not mention if your parents are disabled and unable to care for themselves. If they are, then perhaps you could help them arrange for someone to come in and help them when you can't.

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