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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 07:47 PM
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As a college student, when is the right time to move out?
I'm home for the summer and I don't want to be with my dad anymore. I want to have my own place, not have a curfew, and come in and out as I please. I just found this job where I'm being paid enough to get a furnished place in about 2 weeks tops. But I have to properly budget my money and pay off some things first including getting a car... (it might take longer). My dad has been on my back constantly about finding a job and my curfew is 2am. He says I have to work around the house as well, which isn't a problem. He says I should just stay and save the money. But I really don't want to stay at his house. We both got into a fight, he says I'm acting like a child because I don't get the things I want so I'm running away. There are 7 people (including myself, sister, and dad) living in the house and my brother is suppose to come mid June. I'm only going to be here till August 6th.. I found a furnished apartment in the city ranging from 89-180$ a month.
Should I just wait a year and stay with my dad or as soon as I get the money try, budget, then leave?
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Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
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May 16, 2012, 07:51 PM
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A budget needs to have savings and emergency reserves built int to it. But if you can work out a proper budget, then move.
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Expert
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May 16, 2012, 07:56 PM
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Obviously not the US, where is this at, and the culture. Place in the US would be 600 to 1000 just for a very small room normally.
But what about illness, what about work while in school, what about if your hours get cut. What about car break downs and ( so on)
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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 08:07 PM
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Well, it's a furnished apartment at the Marriot in the city. It ranges from 89-180$ every 30 days. I'm just going to be there during the summer and then when college rolls around I go back. Then for next Summer I do it all over again. I just don't know if I shouldn't do it in order to save money to pay off my college debt. I see what you're saying, that's why I'm also trying to find a second job for backup. But, I'll try my hardest to save. I understand that I'm suppose to follow the rules, it's his house, etc. I just turned 19 and there's about to be 8 people living in a 4 bed-roomed house. He says he has no problem paying for me when it comes to things that make sense, but I just want to make my own living... Would it be the right time to do or should I wait till I graduate or..
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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May 16, 2012, 08:11 PM
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Who is paying for college?
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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 08:14 PM
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I'm taking out loans + I have a pell grant. They're all in my name.
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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May 16, 2012, 08:15 PM
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What will happen at home if you move out? How will your dad handle it?
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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 08:23 PM
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I don't think he wants me to leave. He told me to not be stupid, think, and save money...
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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May 16, 2012, 08:25 PM
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Plus, he wants you around the house to help out, do chores, help him with the younger ones.
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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 08:30 PM
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Basically, and of course follow the rules, come home at curfew, and if I want to spend the night at friends or something I must ask permission, etc, etc.
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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May 16, 2012, 08:32 PM
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And if you live on your own, and can come and go as you please, how dedicated are you going to be to save money, get home at a decent time and get the proper sleep, eat right, etc.
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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 08:40 PM
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Because I will only be doing this during the Summer, I will probably be looking for a second job or be working if I'm lucky enough to find one before the summer hits. For firs thing I'm going to do as soon as I get a steady income is to budget then that way I can see how everything will fall into place for next year with the bill, grocery shopping, gas, etc... I also have to think about books for classes. =/
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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May 16, 2012, 08:41 PM
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And once your friends find out you live on your own?
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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 08:46 PM
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They'd probably be happy for me, maybe come see the place I think and come over sometimes.. I'm trying really hard not to put all my eggs in one basket.
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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May 16, 2012, 08:47 PM
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Remembering me at your age, I'd say suck it up and live at home another year. Find ways to get along and save money like crazy.
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Junior Member
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May 16, 2012, 08:57 PM
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I don't know how to properly get along with my father. I'd sometimes rather say nothing to him then have a "talk" with him. I just don't understand why I still have to ask permission to do things when I haven't at all while in college. It makes no sense to me.
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Jobs & Parenting Expert
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May 16, 2012, 10:37 PM
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I talked with my parents about that. At college (as a female--back when rocks were still cooling), I was allowed a late curfew on weekends, so my parents agreed to allow that when I was at home for holidays, etc.
I'm wondering if you let him know where you are going and promise to inform him of changed plans and be responsible with chores at home and an outside job that maybe just maybe he would allow you the freedom to come and go. After all, you are over 18.
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Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
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May 17, 2012, 03:07 AM
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As WG said, he is still coping with the fact that you are an adult now. You need to make him understand that you are willing to abide by reasonable house rules and responsibilities, but that you have your own life and need your own space as well.
Is your mother involved here? Can she or another family member help as mediator?
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Junior Member
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May 17, 2012, 07:35 AM
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My mother lives in a different city. I tried talking to my dad a second go around. He told me that I'm only going to be here for two months and that he gives as much lee-way (sp.) as possible. He's says he's not strict on me, but he does expect me to be home when he asks me too, especially at curfew. He want to talk about how I'm acting like I'm 5, etc, etc. At that point, I realized there is nothing I can do, but apologize and move on.. I feel really childish right now...
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New Member
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May 17, 2012, 07:42 AM
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Age 23 is the best age because you should have a good education and that's the orignal age to move out and get your own life
Unlless you want to be a person with bad acnie and never have a girlfriend or boyfriend
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