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    Lifeisbest's Avatar
    Lifeisbest Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Nov 22, 2016, 04:26 PM
    Struggling with decision

    I'm torn in my decision right now about work...

    I have been with my company for 10 years. Unfortunately I'm a kind of person attached to what I do.. through the last two years the business went down and company had been downsizing... despite the fact I was behind in my promotion before this two years actually things got worse for me and they start moving me between positions until I got one that's totally different from my career path and background...

    I was cranky at the beginning also for the fact that I'm at same status as someone who just joined the company.. but I had attention from higher management all the time and support for anything I need to implement... escpially I carried a lot of load with less supervision...

    My new manager didn't do this kind of work too... but he got other departments to look after... but he is so micromanaging espcially for things in his level he really doesn't need to worry about... at certain points I felt suffocated... his manager is very attentive woman and she actually always come and check on me in my office... keep in my mind she have 350 people in her organization... so we had to deal with different department that fall under different management due to regulation reporting...

    There is a nasty women I had to deal with who speaks with me in very undermining way... I try to talk care of my part of work... of course she doesn't take care of her part... she hired someone else to do it with no experince and somehow was expecting me to teach her. When I refused she start indirectly pushing my manager to ask me... I stand up for it and I actually held a meeting to discuss who is doing what and divide the work load based on what is related to each department... during the meeting she was trying to push all the work on me and I pushed back and when I try to assign stuff to her new employee she pushed back again although is something totally related to her department...

    My manager was really quite (he is not quite person at all) I asked him so many times to speak up... he didn't and by end of the meeting I lost it.. I start arguing with her and things turned ugly... next day we had inspection from the gov. And she didn't show up and send her new employee who have no clue about their department (the inspection is for both department mine and her) and that was really embarrassing in front of the gov inspectors... I got angry and went to talk to my manager who was calm and told me he will talk to her... which I doubt it at this point and I mention to him that about the meeting that he didn't support me at all... he said I was talking to her in unprofessional way... which made me even more pissed off...

    I send an email to him and his manager about what happen during the inspection and that they need to communicate to the other departments management so this thing won't happen again... two days later he sit with me and told me the message delivered to the other management but we need to work on your communication and we need to work with other departments... since then my manager's manager start to be nasty to me and so many times pass me negative comments in meetings (she used to like me alot)... sometimes when I say good morning she doesn't reply and reply to the next person who say the same... I figure my manager told her something nasty about me...

    so I end up with job I don't like and no support... next meeting we had with the lady in the other departments and her employee I was quite and she end up putting 90%of the action items on me and my manager was quite and the only time he spoke either to make jokes with her or questioning why I can't finish certain things asked even though he already know the background why... I felt very defeated adding to that my work load is crazy... and I lost my only support...

    I decided to quit... I told my manager last Friday... he was so stressed out when I told him... he asked me if there is a way to fix it or change my mind... I explain to him about my late promotions my current position and my emotional stress working with other departments and he only focused on my current position and didn't to address any other issues...

    I saw him today too for our weekly meeting. He didn't mention anything until I'm about to leave the office and he asked me if I change my mind.. he said they are trying to get me another position but can't promise because we are downsizing... his face was sad though surprisingly... after I left his office I got emotional... very hard to leave something you worked for 10 years... also made me feel I'm the bad one... because I know they need to fill this position but nobody can handle it... am I being doormat thinking this way?

    I don't have a plan what to do next... I'm worried about money for sure... all of those thoughts going through my mind right now... sorry for the long message...
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man

    Nov 22, 2016, 07:19 PM
    If you want people to read this, try putting paragraph breaks in and proper Sentence structure.
    ma0641's Avatar
    ma0641 Posts: 15,681, Reputation: 1012
    Uber Member

    Nov 22, 2016, 07:24 PM
    For sure, no way to read this and comprehend. Shorten as there is a lot of He said, his face was sad etc.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,495, Reputation: 2853
    Uber Member

    Nov 22, 2016, 07:56 PM
    Simple.. you really AREN'T entitled to anything at work... even if you earned it. If you aren't happy you leave and find a new employer that might value you more than the current one. If how you feel is right..then there are many employers out there.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man

    Nov 23, 2016, 04:25 AM
    This was a little easier to read. But only a little. For example:
    me and my manager was quite and the only time he spoke
    I'm guessing you meant quiet, not quite.

    But the bottom line is if you are unhappy with the way the job is treating you, you talk to management and if that doesn't help, you start looking for a new job.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,213, Reputation: 10853

    Nov 23, 2016, 08:45 AM
    You obviously need a friend outside of work, or family member to vent to, and I recommend that highly since you seem prone to emotional impulsive decisions. Situations obviously have you emotionally overwhelmed.

    What you need is a plan to change jobs or at least actively explore other opportunities BEFORE you walk away from the sure thing you already have. We cannot control the people, places, and things around us, but we can learn to control how we act, and react to them, and that's the REAL help you need right now, someone or something to help you get control of yourself and relieve some of that stress your job is causing you.

    Got a good friend/family member/mentor to vent too?
    Lifeisbest's Avatar
    Lifeisbest Posts: 19, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Dec 13, 2016, 09:16 PM
    Thank you all for the reply... I had made my decision to leave the job and everyday passes it proves to me it was the right decision... my notice period finish by mid January... I'm trying to make sure the work flow goes as normal... and proper handover is maintained... unfortunately my manager still treating me as the bad one still...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,213, Reputation: 10853

    Dec 14, 2016, 07:20 AM
    Simply mark off the days on your private calendar that you can finally put this behind you. Realizing that this is almost over should give you strength to carry on and look FORWARD to building something better.

    Why keep looking back and ruining your day?

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