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    jellybeans1's Avatar
    jellybeans1 Posts: 52, Reputation: 3
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    #1

    Jan 20, 2017, 01:52 AM
    Nothing helps my mental health
    I am looking for opinions on my situation and/or possible steps I can take to improve it. Please do not suggest a lifestyle change or tell me it is all in my head. I have tried living a healthy active lifestyle, but it has never made a difference. I have also tried many natural substances.
    I am 24 year old female and I have been dealing with mental health from around the age of 12. It first began with typical depression and during the winter season, I began to get the SADS. I used a Panasonic sunlight to help treat the SADS, typically with no improvement. During the summer months I felt normal again besides the depression. When I was 14 my SADS never went away and I sunk into and even deeper depression. I began to get anxiety issues as well. I started seeing counsellors and getting tested for multiple issues and was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. One day when I was 15, a sudden feeling of exhaustion and foggyiness hit me. I remember the moment it happened, I was sitting in science class. The feeling is almost as if everything is dark and all of my senses are dulled, almost like a crappy high. Like there is a constant white noise/fuzzy TV going on in my head, but only it's a feeling. It comes hand in hand with me being extremely lethargic and tired. I have never been able to properly describe it and don't expect anyone to understand. But it has been the most frustrating part of all of this. No matter what I do, I am always so exhausted. From the age of 15, I was put on birthcontrol (for hormone therapy) and antidepressants. I have taken breaks from medications and tried alternate sources of treatments, but being on no medication is torturous. I have been poked and prodded more times than I could possibly remember, with no results of anything physically wrong. A couple of years ago, maybe even 3, I suddenly got a burst of energy and motivation. I went out of the bar for the first time and started going out every weekend and made lots of friends. I never really had any friends since high school as it's too exhausting. So for about 10 months I was this reckless ball of energy. Although I still felt extremely tired and had this constant feeling in my head, along with the depression and anxiety. Either way it was extremely out of character for me. After the 10 months I crashed hard. I had a major mental breakdown and I was no longer able to work. I began having panic attacks daily and had no motivation to do anything. I never really had motivation before that year, but this was different. When I tried working, I was so slow and it was almost physically impossible. I used to be a fast paced worker and would go above and beyond. I had to go on income assistance and I am now on disabilty. Due to that, my doctor had me see new specialists and they determined that I have bipolar disorder type 2, borderline personality disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. According to them my sudden burst of energy was me being in a state of Hyper-mania. And then I crashed into hypo-mania. I am currently in DBT and on medications for bipolar disorder. They do not really help and neither has any other medication. I guess I have been on 1 medication that made that foggy feeling go away for a week, but that's it. After that week the medication did more harm than good and created symptoms of psychosis and other issues, but it made it so I thought those problems were normal. I am pretty positive I do have bipolar disorder as I have many symptoms and it runs very strongly on both sides of my family. But because nothing has ever helped this feeling I feel like something else is wrong. The next medication I am going on is lithium, which is the only medication that ever worked for my grandma. So I am hoping that will make a difference.
    I am hoping there is someone with a similar situation who can reply or to even know if anyone has experienced that foggy feeling I have.
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,593, Reputation: 2941
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    #2

    Jan 20, 2017, 06:08 AM
    jellybeans, I applaud all your efforts, and you write well, which helps us a lot. I am very sympathetic to all you are going through, having gone through much depression throughout my 70 years.
    But I asked you some questions last week and you didn't answer.
    Given that there CAN be a physiological component to any mental condition, and there is much that can be missed despite all the poking and prodding medically, I want to know how you can be both overweight and yet malnourished from not eating. I'm guessing that you do overeat, are not really malnourished, yet are not particularly healthy because of what you do eat. (That's true of me, and many others, so I'm guessing based on years of experience.)
    I'm not discounting bipolar at all! It really does sound like you may have inherited a trait. But every mental condition can be reduced a lot by how you live your daily life, mainly in how you eat and how you reduce stress.
    I took lithium in the mid 1970s. For me it was a disaster and did nothing for depression. It had dramatic side effects that I later found happen in less than 1% of people.
    I remember reading once that the SW US has lithium naturally in the water and that the populace there has lower rates of depression than the rest of the US. Who knows if that's true or not, and who knows what a dose should be. It's a serious drug.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,769, Reputation: 5427
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    #3

    Jan 20, 2017, 09:48 AM
    My bipolar uncle did well on lithium. He had to have monthly blood tests to check his lithium level. His problem came when he'd feel good for an extended time (usually years), so he'd stop taking the lithium, thinking he was cured. Within two weeks, I'd be driving him to the VA hospital for a 6-8 week stay to get him back on track.

    I don't know if lithium will help you, jellybeans. For my uncle, it was a lifesaver. I do wish you well and hope your doctors figure out to get rid of your foggy feeling.
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,593, Reputation: 2941
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    #4

    Jan 20, 2017, 01:57 PM
    TWO WEEKS AGO: "I am extremely malnutrished as I don't eat much. I just found out I have high blood pressure due to a combination of me being overweight, malnutrished, stressed and my mental health medications."

    I could talk a lot about handling depression, but jellybean has decided that my simple request for information on her weight and eating habits isn't worth explaining.
    Good luck with a life time of getting nowhere, quite possibly.
    jellybeans1's Avatar
    jellybeans1 Posts: 52, Reputation: 3
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    #5

    Jan 20, 2017, 02:16 PM
    I am about 20 pounds overweight and I only eat about 1 meal a day, which usually consists or processed foods. I have a fairly tight budget due to being on disabilty. So I rely on my boyfriend paying for groceries. I am malnutrished because I do not get the proper food I need. I also drink quite a bit of milk. So the things I do eat, consist of a lot of sodium and sugar and contain quite a bit if calories. Before being on disabilty I used to eat 3 balanced meals a day and would work out at the gym for an hour 5-6 days out of 7. I was also an active teenager and ate very well. I played rugby, had a gym membership and made sure I was in a gym class every semester. If I could afford it, I would still eat that way. But even then, it didn't make much of a difference in my mental health. This foggy feeling has always been the same.

    No need to be rude. I didn't reply because I found your answer to be sarcastic
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,593, Reputation: 2941
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    #6

    Jan 20, 2017, 02:29 PM
    It wasn't sarcastic at all. Nor rude. I really did care.

    I could write a lot more but don't feel like it now. It would start with your budget, boyfriend and what you eat and drink. You won't like it and will call me rude again.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,769, Reputation: 5427
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    #7

    Jan 20, 2017, 02:37 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jellybeans1 View Post
    I only eat about 1 meal a day, which usually consists or processed foods. I have a fairly tight budget due to being on disabilty. So I rely on my boyfriend paying for groceries
    Certainly you can whomp up three decent and nutritious meals a day. Can you cook? Then eat leftovers in various permutations? Beef stew, scrambled eggs, salads, casseroles, OMG I want to take you shopping and share recipes with you!

    I am malnutrished because I do not get the proper food I need. I also drink quite a bit of milk. So the things I do eat, consist of a lot of sodium and sugar and contain quite a bit if calories.
    We can help you make a list of healthful, yet inexpensive foods to buy and nutritious meals to cook.
    jellybeans1's Avatar
    jellybeans1 Posts: 52, Reputation: 3
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    #8

    Jan 20, 2017, 02:58 PM
    You may not have meant for it to sound that way, but that's how I perceived it. I tend to be very sensitive and avoid situations that I do not like.

    I am all right at cooking if I have a recipe to follow. That would be very helpful. My boyfriend would probably be more willing to buy the things I need if I were to give a list of the things I want to make and the ingredients for them. I am usually stuck with ichiban noodles and kraft dinner.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,769, Reputation: 5427
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    #9

    Jan 20, 2017, 03:10 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jellybeans1 View Post
    I am all right at cooking if I have a recipe to follow. That would be very helpful. My boyfriend would probably be more willing to buy the things I need if I were to give a list of the things I want to make and the ingredients for them. I am usually stuck with ichiban noodles and kraft dinner.
    Hmmmm, how can we do this in the easiest way?
    1) Are you allergic to anything?
    2) You have a stove/oven and microwave?
    3) What's your weekly food budget?
    joypulv's Avatar
    joypulv Posts: 21,593, Reputation: 2941
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    #10

    Jan 20, 2017, 03:12 PM
    I have spent a lifetime working to overcome sensitivity and situations that I do not like.
    But I think today I will indulge myself. Fortunately, Wondergirl is here.
    DoulaLC's Avatar
    DoulaLC Posts: 10,488, Reputation: 1952
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    #11

    Jan 20, 2017, 03:15 PM
    Ask your doctor about a referral to a registered dietician. Your body, and mind, simply will not work as it should with how you are eating. Getting on track with nourishing your body and mind with what it needs, should be the next step in your plan towards improving your over all health.

    This doesn't mean medication is not necessary, but proper nutrition lays the foundation for everything else.

    It is vital that you make this a major part of your life. If you aren't eating well, getting some regular exercise, or sleeping well, you can't expect to feel well, or have your body and mind work as well as possible.

    A dietician can help with lists and recipes for easy and inexpensive changes to start with.
    You can do this! You've already shown determination to seek support and help.
    jellybeans1's Avatar
    jellybeans1 Posts: 52, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #12

    Jan 20, 2017, 06:13 PM
    The only food I'm allergic to is blue cheese. I have an oven/stove and microwave and I could probably get $20-$30 a week out of my boyfriend if I can convince him. If you have another form of communication it would probably be much easier. This website doesn't work very well on my phone.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,769, Reputation: 5427
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    #13

    Jan 20, 2017, 07:57 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jellybeans1 View Post
    The only food I'm allergic to is blue cheese. I have an oven/stove and microwave and I could probably get $20-$30 a week out of my boyfriend if I can convince him. If you have another form of communication it would probably be much easier. This website doesn't work very well on my phone.
    One thing you'd have to work on would be meal planning. Any thoughts on Doula's idea of finding a nutritionist/dietitian to help you?
    jellybeans1's Avatar
    jellybeans1 Posts: 52, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #14

    Jan 20, 2017, 08:48 PM
    I will have to see if my doctor would be able to do that. It may take a while because he only focuses on one thing at a time and there are limited amount of appointments. Right now he's concerned with a much more series issue with me. I will still try to see if there is any way they can fit me in to talk about this.

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