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    EricaMissAmerica's Avatar
    EricaMissAmerica Posts: 4, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #1

    Feb 28, 2007, 07:40 AM
    For my husband
    I don't know how to start. Do I just say I hate myself. I am a young mother of 2. I've been married for 1 1/2 and my insecurities are going to ruin us. I can't watch a movie without starting an argument with my husband. Its so sad. I'm not over weight. I'm actually pretty petite. It's having to take my clothes off that's the problem. No matter how hard I work out, eat healthy, nothing will fix it. I don't have sagging skin or stretch marks. I have ugly private parts and nothing but plastic surgery will change that. Having 2 beautiful girls just made it even worse. Its so hard being women. You're suppose to be beautiful with clothes on but even more beautiful with them off. Everything I have that makes me a women is nasty. I just want to look at myself and be happy with what I see. Is there anyway I can see past this? Will I ever be able to look forward to getting naked for my husband?
    lynnetara sweeney's Avatar
    lynnetara sweeney Posts: 2, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #2

    Feb 28, 2007, 08:31 AM
    STOP IT NOW.Something happened to you ,maybe an off hand comment and you have taken that negativity and created a horrible mountain to hide behind. A woman's vagina isn't all that pretty even wiithout having children except to those ,men and lesbians ,who like them as they are.If your breats are sagging then do modifies pushups and light free weights to tighten up the pectorals but stop complaining.You could be blind,in a whellchair ,homelss or have hadicapped children. Start serios power walking to clear out the cobwebs in your brain. Share your insecrities with your husband ,best friend and therapist.You are not alone feeling unattractive after kids but real beauty begins inside and blossums outside.Life is full and things happen. P.A.C.E. yourself... positive attitude/action changes everything.
    andrometa's Avatar
    andrometa Posts: 8, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #3

    Feb 28, 2007, 08:39 AM
    Having children is stressful and the changes that your body has gone through, is hard both physically and emotionally. The hormone changes alone are a roller coaster ride.

    What you need to do right now is stop focusing on whatever you think is wrong with you. We all have things we don't like. No woman is "perfect". Perfection is an illusion, it doesn't exist.

    Go look in the mirror, and find one thing on your body that you like. For me, it's my eyes. But find just one thing. And focus on that. Think about how you can show that asset off. I do dramatic eye makeup to bring mine out. That makes me feel sexy. Every time I go to the mirror, and I see my eyes, I'm like, "wow!".

    Don't focus on anything else on your body right now. Just start with one thing. When you feel good about that one thing, find a second body part and focus on that.

    Eventually you will find that you will feel better about you.

    I also think you need to talk to someone, because no one should ever feel about themselves the way you do.

    Beauty isn't something that is just on the outside. If you believe you are beautiful, you will be. I know it sounds really ridiculous to you right now, but I swear to you, it's true.

    *hug* I really hope you can get through this.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Mar 2, 2007, 09:31 PM
    If your married and have two kids, your husband has seen you naked and it sounds like he approves since he hasn't run from you yet. If he does it's not going to be because of your body but because of your mind.

    That is what you need to work on and fix whatever insecurities you have.
    kacieconine's Avatar
    kacieconine Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Oct 27, 2007, 10:37 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by EricaMissAmerica
    I dont know how to start. Do i just say i hate myself. I am a young mother of 2. I've been married for 1 1/2 and my insecurities are going to ruin us. I can't watch a movie without starting an argument with my husband. Its so sad. I'm not over weight. I'm actually pretty petite. It's having to take my clothes off that's the problem. No matter how hard I work out, eat healthy, nothing will fix it. I dont have sagging skin or stretch marks. i have ugly private parts and nothing but plastic surgery will change that. Having 2 beautiful girls just made it even worse. Its so hard being women. Youre suppose to be beautiful with clothes on but even more beautiful with them off. Everything i have that makes me a women is nasty. I just want to look at myself and be happy with what i see. Is there anyway i can see past this? Will i ever be able to look forward to getting naked for my husband?
    OK first of all god made you the way you are. And if your husband can't understand that then there is something wrong. A man doesn't like an insecure person at all... he wants a woman who is proud and confident. Even if you really don't feel that way. I have a daughter and I got stretch marks and I don't care at all about them inmatter of fact I still wear a two piece bathing suit in the summer and my husband thinks that is soooo attractive for me to not even care what other people think. You need to be proud of who you are and don't let anything get between that. Obviously your husband loves you for who you are and nothing will change that. Trust me.

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