Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    ErikaKensuke's Avatar
    ErikaKensuke Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:00 PM
    Worrying Symptoms of a loved one
    My boyfriend has a problem with breathing when he eats. When he eats anything, he gets light headed, feels this separate pulse that isn't his, but it's near his chest. He coughs, he can't breathe, and he becomes unconscious until I shake him back. His only solution is to only eat cold foods, like Ice cream, but it still bothers him, just not as bad... He has the metabolism to cater to it for now, but that won't last as he get's older... I'm worried about him, and his parent's haven't done anything to help, even when he's having these attacks right in front of them. I think it's a type of cyst and it's gotten worse over the months. Drinking water helps a little, but his stomach starts to hurt if he drinks too much water.
    Is there any way I can help him without a doctor? He's under 18 so if I take him to a doctor, they can't do anything without the help of his unhelpful parents.
    ma0641's Avatar
    ma0641 Posts: 15,681, Reputation: 1012
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:19 PM
    Help without a doctor? No. That's what doctors are for. Surely he knows how to go to a doctor.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 37,769, Reputation: 5427
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
     
    #3

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:25 PM
    Do his parents go to a doctor for general problems?
    teacherjenn4's Avatar
    teacherjenn4 Posts: 3,997, Reputation: 468
    Education Expert
     
    #4

    Sep 27, 2013, 09:07 PM
    Is he still in school? If so, have him see the school nurse. The nurse can report any problems to his parents for further medical care.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,277, Reputation: 7690
    Expert
     
    #5

    Sep 28, 2013, 04:36 AM
    These are serious, even life threatening problems. He must see a doctor about it.

    Is there a culture or religious reason for not going to the doctor ?
    ErikaKensuke's Avatar
    ErikaKensuke Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #6

    Oct 1, 2013, 06:47 PM
    There are no religious issues, and they have only seen a doctor earlier this year. The doctors in our town primarily only receive half of their training, and the doctor who originally saw him told him he was growing a breast. I'm pretty sure a skinny male growing a breast is not really possible nor should it cause such problems.
    I hate to bring personal matters into this, but his family isn't very functional when it comes to him, because of his mother's relationship with her ex-husband, aka my boyfriend's father. I have reason to believe that his mother and step father are great parents when it comes to my boyfriends siblings, who are all girls. However, he receives the short end of the stick possibly because of psychological reasons in the mother. Which is why he has no help getting the help he needs from his parents. Also if he tries to bring anything about it up to a nurse or someone who knows his parents, they tell them right away because they have the "out in public perfect parent" mask.
    Sinquisitive's Avatar
    Sinquisitive Posts: 27, Reputation: 10
    New Member
     
    #7

    Oct 3, 2013, 01:07 AM
    Could be an allergy or could be something much worse. Sorry to say, because I know what it's like to come from a family that doesn't want to take their children to a doctor- but he needs to go see a doctor. There's really no other way about it. This is a serious issue, and regardless of whether he or his family WANTS to see a doctor, this needs to be addressed- his LIFE is at stake, screw his parents. Maybe he could go to a doctor out-of-town? Bus tickets to nearby cities are usually not that expensive, and seriously, his life is worth more than the ticket, or the confrontation he might have with his parents. Sometimes in life, you have to stand up against people who are standing in your way- I think, for him, this is probably one of those times. Good luck to you both.
    ErikaKensuke's Avatar
    ErikaKensuke Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Oct 3, 2013, 03:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Sinquisitive View Post
    Could be an allergy or could be something much worse. Sorry to say, because I know what it's like to come from a family that doesn't want to take their children to a doctor- but he needs to go see a doctor. There's really no other way about it. This is a serious issue, and regardless of whether or not he or his family WANTS to see a doctor, this needs to be addressed- his LIFE is at stake, screw his parents. Maybe he could go to a doctor out-of-town? Bus tickets to nearby cities are usually not that expensive, and seriously, his life is worth more than the ticket, or the confrontation he might have with his parents. Sometimes in life, you have to stand up against people who are standing in your way- I think, for him, this is probably one of those times. Good luck to you both.
    Most hospitals require a parent's permission if you're under 18, right? If we go out of town/county/state, wouldn't we still have to make a phone call to get the parent's permission?
    maxinealonso's Avatar
    maxinealonso Posts: 11, Reputation: 5
    New Member
     
    #9

    Oct 3, 2013, 04:03 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ErikaKensuke View Post
    Most hospitals require a parent's permission if you're under 18, right? If we go out of town/county/state, wouldn't we still have to make a phone call to get the parent's permission?
    You need a parent's consent for TREATMENT, not for diagnosis. I was an emancipated minor because my parents neglected me in similar ways to this. Trust me, you do not need their permission to see a doctor, you need their permission for treatment, surgery, etc. I'm sure if he went to his parents with evidence of his diagnosis (whatever it may be) they'd HAVE to get him the treatment he needs. If they still refuse, this is child abuse and DYFS should be notified.
    Sinquisitive's Avatar
    Sinquisitive Posts: 27, Reputation: 10
    New Member
     
    #10

    Oct 3, 2013, 07:30 PM
    Yes, what maxinealonso said. His parents would be hard-pressed to deny him treatment when a doctor is telling them that something is wrong. And if they did, that is considered child abuse, and depending on how old your boyfriend is.. He can declare independence from his parents if absolutely necessary. But really, how could you deny your child treatment when a doctor is telling you that his life is in danger?
    ErikaKensuke's Avatar
    ErikaKensuke Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #11

    Oct 9, 2013, 05:03 PM
    His parents have sent him to different facilities because of things in the past. Because of his father's actions, and the divorce when he was about 9 or so, he didn't know how to react, so he got into trouble here and there, so if there's any little thing, his mother brings up those times he did something wrong. As said above, he's been sent to mental facilities and sees multiple therapists because his mother doesn't know how to deal with him. Because of the multiple therapists, none of them have a full idea of what goes on, and so the mask stays on, and she thinks what she does is always right. Also because of her actions, he is Paranoid as hell, and think his mom will call the cops on him for any little thing. He has a licence, but the car isn't his it's his step dad's, and he can't get a job because his parents haven't taken him,and he hasn't been able to drive anywhere to get an application except for the few I've picked up for him. His step father paid 1,500 for the car, and had to do some minor adjustments because something was broken and the brakes were close to braking. My boyfriend doesn't own the car, so he wanted to buy it off his step dad. When my boyfriend asked how much it would be to buy it off him, the step dad said 3,000. Which he has no job to pay it off, so he's kind of stuck.
    Back to heath matters, could it be making things worse that he's a little high-strung? Takes things too seriously? That probably affects blood pressure right? Could that affect something like this?

    Sorry, I know this has kind of switched off to mental/psychological things, but I'm trying to explain the best I can... I'll try to explain to my boyfriend that he doesn't need parental permission to get a diagnosis. Thanks everyone.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,318, Reputation: 5972
    Pets Expert
     
    #12

    Oct 9, 2013, 05:48 PM
    Bottom line, no one, not even a doctor, can diagnose online. Even if a doctor could, he/she wouldn't risk their license by giving a diagnosis without running tests.

    So I'm really not sure what you're hoping for here. We can't tell you what's going on with your boyfriend, only a doctor can. We can guess until the cows come home, but it won't help him one bit.

    He has a few options. Find a way to see a doctor that can diagnose him (if that means reporting his parents for not providing proper medical care, so be it), or live with it and hope it doesn't kill him.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

My Ex is Worrying Me [ 10 Answers ]

Okay, so I had a long distance girlfriend a while back, and we didn't see each other a lot, but we made it work and . However, Recently I decided after a few times that she turned down my invitation to come visit me (My parents know we're together, hers don't, because I'm from a town that has a bad...

2 days late & my cycle symptoms are also symptoms of pregnancy... should I be worried? [ 5 Answers ]

My boyfriend & I were messing around & now I'm two days late. I usually have discharge before my period & right now it appears to be the same. I have my usual symptoms before my cycle but they are also symptoms of pregnancy. Should I be worried & take a pregnancy test or should I wait a little to...

Worrying [ 1 Answers ]

I am a 20 year old female who tends to worry and stress A LOT! I worry so much that I can't sleep at night because my mind keeps going. I tend to think a lot about things that has happened to me in my past and that I know I can't change and also about things that are happening in my life now. I get...

I thought I loved him... But I don't know if I just.. Love being loved by someone? [ 2 Answers ]

Okay, so we've been friends for over a year, and have been dating for 7 months. We're in a long distance relationship and will be for awhile if we stay together(school and stuff) and I KNOW he's crazy in love with me, and I tell him I love him too. But.. if any other guy asked me out I'd break up...

Am I worrying too much? [ 5 Answers ]

All right, so I am with this girl who means a lot to me. We had broken up and gotten together before, and have slept together a few times. Right now she is on birthcontrol, and she takes it respossibly every day. We both want to be able to have sex. She is completely ready for it and has no...


View more questions Search