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    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646

    Sep 16, 2006, 03:47 PM
    Thought I would share this PM
    Hey folks, I thought I would share this PM I got from hedieh. Guess we got through!!

    I love to hear a happy ending!! :D:D

    hedieh vbmenu_register("postmenu_", true);
    New Member
    Join Date: Jul 2006
    Posts: 14

    thanks for ur help
    Hi,thank you so much for helping me what I wrote that I'm jealouse to my husband,after I read your note,I feel so relax,guess what? Me & my husband go out today,I never feel jealous,I never look at his eyes to see where he look at,I feel I had nice shopping today.I just find when he look at women accidentally who pass cross us in street,he feel so uncomfortbale because he doesn't want make me upset,so I think how bad I am that make him feel uncomfortbale when we go out & want to have nice time.thx so much you help me a lot.I met my husband online,I lived in middle east& he live in uk,we've been friend for 3years, he came to my country & visit me then I came to england & then we got 6months that we got 26,coming to new country,abit problem with language,with no friend & I left all my family,my friends,my job... in my country to coming here with my happy with him,just I think I lost myself confidence for those reason.I just tell you my story & if is OK I want to write for you now & then because I don't have anybody here to consult with.agian thanks so much to you,I think you save my marriage life.
    curlybenswife's Avatar
    curlybenswife Posts: 2,477, Reputation: 267
    Ultra Member

    Sep 16, 2006, 05:36 PM
    :D aaawwwwww that's lovely kind of makes you all warm and fuzzy
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646

    Sep 16, 2006, 05:39 PM
    Yeah, it does, doesn't it. I am sure she feels a much more confident now.

    I just love happy endings, wants me to hug my hubby and tell him I love him.
    curlybenswife's Avatar
    curlybenswife Posts: 2,477, Reputation: 267
    Ultra Member

    Sep 16, 2006, 05:46 PM
    Hehhehehehe give him one from me then too as bens in the land of nod!
    momincali's Avatar
    momincali Posts: 641, Reputation: 242
    Senior Member

    Sep 16, 2006, 10:48 PM
    That makes me feel really happy for her. Thanks for sharing that one!
    daisydukepw1775's Avatar
    daisydukepw1775 Posts: 10, Reputation: 2
    New Member

    Sep 16, 2006, 10:56 PM
    I'm happy for her. Can you tell me what you told her because my husband constantly stares at the ground to keep me from getting mad. Thank you.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646

    Sep 17, 2006, 06:54 AM
    Here was the original question

    Originally Posted by heideh
    I'm so jealose to my husband,whenever we go out,I think he look at other women,I keep look at his eyes to find where he look at.I told him about what I thinking & he said he looks everybody not just women or if he looks women he not mean it.he loves me,he keep saying I'm beautiful.. . But I know I don't have any self confidence & I think he looks other women who more beautiful than me.sometimes I thinking if he get friend with other women & I didn't know.I know is stupid but how I can I stop it?

    And here was my original answer

    Originally posted by J_9
    I believe this could possibly be an issue of trust, Hedieh. Has anyone every cheated on you before? Do you have any actual real reason to believe that he is "looking" at other people in a sexual way?

    If he were not looking at people, men or women, he would be blind. It is human nature to look at people. It is quite normal. My husband frequently points out beautiful women to me. He says he likes the hairstyle or the sense of fashion, but he is not looking in a sexual manner.

    We joke and say that "just because we are on a diet doesn't mean we can't read the menu." It basically means that because we are married we will not cheat on each other, but we are human and cannot help but look at other people.

    I am wondering if the trust issues could be from childhood, you seem to have very low self esteem. Talkng to a trusted friend or a professional may be in your best interests.

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