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nidhiarora16 · Jun 28, 2011, 12:34 PM

I got married to my husband last year. He mentioned me about his girl friend before marriage but I never doubted him before but recently I don't know I started asking him about his ex. My main concern is that he should have never slept with her before me and if he have he should tell me. I have been questioning him about her he have told me that he had relation only for 1 year in college and also he told me that he didn't wanted to marry that girl because of culture differences so he didn't want to sleep with her. He also told me having sex before marriage is not considered right for him.

He also told me that I can ask his ex and clear up my mind so that we can happily live after that. He also mentioned that he just kissed her few times and once she tried to get closer to him but he stopped her. He also swear to god and parents that he have not done anything.

But I do not believe anything he say, I do not know why I can't believe him I still get doubt that he is lying to me, he is hiding something from me. I don't know how to overcome this situation. Should I contact his ex to clarify my doubts?

Wondergirl · Jun 28, 2011, 12:37 PM

No, do not contact his ex. Why can't you believe him? What he says sounds reasonable and honest.

CB<3<3 · Jul 26, 2011, 12:06 PM

Do what ever you think is right for your relationship contact her if you truly doubt your husband and also try not to make the situation worse contact her without anybody knowing that's the best way

Cat1864 · Jul 28, 2011, 09:22 AM

It won't matter what either of them say if you don't want to believe the truth.

You seem to have your mind made up. Is there any reason why you want him to be guilty of lying to you?

Are there other problems in the marriage and you are focusing on this one to keep from thinking about the rest? Have there been any changes in your life that are bringing these thoughts out?

Jake2008 · Jul 28, 2011, 11:19 PM

It's time to put on your big girl pants, and realize you are being accusatory without any reason, selfish in pushing your insecurities upon your husband, and acting like a baby.

And to think contacting her is a good idea? Why would you further this nonsense and make yourself look like a fool.

If you don't trust him, and you have reason not to trust him, that's one thing. But, if you are acting out of jealousy over something that never happened, you are heading down a slippery slope of destroying your marriage.

If you are this upset about some broad he kissed while he was in college, before he married you, even if you let this go, what's next? I'm not so sure you would be satisfied with anything he says.

And, in my humble opinion, you married him, not his past. And so what if he slept with 100 girls before he found you. That is is past, and none of your business anyway.

Homegirl 50 · Jul 29, 2011, 12:12 PM

You have no right to ask his ex about anything. That is just kooky.
Has your husband given you any reason to distrust him? Where is all of this coming from?
I agree with Jake 2008 who he slept with before you I none of your business and the fact that you have this "need to know" is your problem as I see it.

talaniman · Aug 1, 2011, 02:47 PM

If you don't believe him, why did you marry him? Why did you not talk of these things before you got married? Why are you so threatened by what he did before he met you? That's what you should deal with, your insecurities and not his past.

Alty · Aug 1, 2011, 04:23 PM

Everyone has a past, and his is his business only. It's not your business.

He doesn't have to justify anything he did before he met you. Even though he didn't have to tell you this info, he still did, but you don't believe him.

That's your problem.

Even if he did have sex with this girl, they were together then, you weren't in the picture. You have no right to be upset about this.

Get over it. This is a very sill reason to be upset.